madison

here here to the injured!
tell tryst to stop slitting her wrists at work!!!

so i know its thursday but i'm going to talk about tuesday.
here's a lesson to young adult girls ranging in the early twenties and thirties age.
now sit in a circle and i'll begin.

i went job hunting with my friend holly and we were all frustrated getting lost and getting no where with our resumes and consistant ap filling out. so about 4 0'clock we decide to stop and get a drink.

so we go to this sausage party dive bar where besides the one bartender we were the only girls.we talked about how are lives will never be anything and we should just throw our dignity out the door and dance for a living. how we lost our niche and can never go back to the mentionable abuse of our mutual past employment together. was interupted by two guys,got hit on and decided it was time to go.
besides you really only need one long island before dinner to catch a buzz.

so la dee da i decide to meet up with slutboxchris to get some quality time in before we went to his band's practice. we had a bowl of crispy greens. then left.

now, i had a stomach ach all day which plays no part in this matter. i was sitting in a folding chair while they're getting tuned louder and louder.
I was sitting there thinking "i must be getting old because this is really loud"
i started to get annoyed and hot and my ears were ringing so i stood up and told slut "i'm going to go sit in your car and get some air."





i never made it.
as i was walking toward the stairs to go up and out. I PASSED THE FUCK OUT!

and as i was passing out fell on the stairs ON MY FACE.
unconscious and full of blood my scared enough to piss his pants boy laid me down and cleaned me up.

my chin was split open...i was spitting out blood. and oh man did my face hurt. i looked like chris farley from tommy boy.
when they're at the dinosour stop after there car is ruined and little scared man hits him in the face with a board.
it doesn't hurt here so much or here really but right here!
and the waitress goes "oh my god what happened to your face!"

i had a perfect stair mark bruise on my jaw where i caught the metal brackets on the corner.

one of my less gracefull moments.

(a new band member walks down the stairs to find a bloody fainty girl what a welcome into the group eh?)

so i go to the hospital and they're more concerned with the fact that i passed out than the fact the i fell on my face!
no stitches on the inside or outside of my mouth/chin. no missing or broken teeth. tongue intact. oh i must not have broke my jaw.

i get hooked up to a ekg. i get xrayed for bloodclots in my lungs and heart. they take like five samples of blood a tetnus shot a piss test. which thanks i'm not pregnant again. blood pressure normal, cholesterol normal.
and a catscan! a flippin catscan. those are horrible or the dye for the catscan was horrible.

went in at like 9pm and left at 2 am!

conclusion i'm fine! just a bit swollen faced.

but here's the lesson to all you ladies.
don't stand up fast.
the dr. states " you'd be surprised how many young ladies faint all the time from standing up so fast. they're blood drops and they drop"

so beware of the standing up to fast!!!!!!!
now stop sitting around in the circle hurry up and get up so i can watch you fall.....

that's a joke please becareful with your beautiful bodies girls!!!