maddy

well i thought i might be dying yesterday. i almost went to the hospital. i had a migraine but it was sooo bad i didn't know what to do. i about passed out everytime i stood up and couldn't quit shaking and throwing up. it fuckin sucked. i was supposed to be at work but no one would cover for me, so i had to send my bf, which could have gotten me fired. he works for the same company just a different store.
so lots of nyquil and pot later, i could tolerate going to work for 3 hours.

as i laid there is pain, all i could think about was what the hell could be wrong with me. then i had a lucid dream of being diagnosed with brain cancer and everything after. i always think of the worse.

now i need to see if i can find a doctor that doesn't have their head up their ass and can actually help me. after all the tests i have had and all they could say was "you have stress related headaches, here is some migraine medicine" the migraine medicine doesn't fucking work!!! it makes me feel worse. but do you think anyone would try an alternate treatment? hell no. they just let me be in pain.

i hate doctors sometimes. it seems like they never believe what i am saying.

sorry for the rant, there are worse things

RIP Ondine