machete

le sigh.....

i miss my mom.... i miss oregon.. i miss my old friends....

maybe its the weather but something for me is not right in the air. i think i really just miss my home, my family, and friends. going a year and a half without seeing my mom then spending 3 weeks together. leaving her at the airport yesterday was the hardest thing i have ever done.
which scares me if i ever do go back home for a visit. i dont think i would get on that plane back to jersey. i dont know i think i just need to get away somewhere for a week with no cell phone no internet.. just escape from the world for awhile. get my head back on straight. figure out what is more important. my life here on the east coast that doesnt make me happy. or my old life back home.. or maybe just a new one somewhere else..

i can feel im getting that bug again. after a certain amount of time i cant live in one place for to long. i get bored or unhappy and i pick up leave and start somewhere else. i think its that time again... now whether thats healthy or not. im not sure... but it makes me feel better.

on brighter news i do have one thing to look forward to this week. brooklyn.. photoshoot day! really excited .. she's another girl i havent seen for awhile and i miss the shit out of her...

alright enough for now.. in the shower and time to get ready for work..