it's funny seeing friends after so long. I can't really put it into words. I'm glad I didn't keep touch. Saying it doesn't make me terrible. The decisions I've made shaped me into who i am. I'm flawed, but worth sticking around. If I'd gone the other route, there's no telling how bad I'd be now. Dead, probably. At the very least, alone, and hopeless, and wishing i was dead. I still get that sometimes, but it's what makes me deep and interesting, so it is what it is. The party had the makings of a late 20-somethings' frat party. But it was a labor day, and what is supposed to happen on labor day? I'll stop judging now.
Saw stephanie, and robyn d. tonight. nice to see them, especially robyn. Would have talked to them more if I was alone. I remember bringing a book of poetry to her house to read while everyone was in her pool. we just hung out and read aloud, while guys looking at me like i was the asshole, when i think i was the only one not trying to get in her pants. She was one of the untouchables. Up on that pedestal I put her, out of reach. safe. Couldn't fail at what i didn't go for. SAFE.
I'm gonna apologize to stephanie. I'd been talking to her a couple times on myspace, and didn't immediately say hello to her. Again, because i wasn't alone.
In other news"
Work's been ok now for a couple of days.
I'm terrified of going back to school. (even though I've been told I'll be love fodder for some young coed)
Cars are running alright (can't say i'll take my rabbit to school yet. Maybe if i get it painted....we'll see.)
i'm gonna cut this one short.... later
Saw stephanie, and robyn d. tonight. nice to see them, especially robyn. Would have talked to them more if I was alone. I remember bringing a book of poetry to her house to read while everyone was in her pool. we just hung out and read aloud, while guys looking at me like i was the asshole, when i think i was the only one not trying to get in her pants. She was one of the untouchables. Up on that pedestal I put her, out of reach. safe. Couldn't fail at what i didn't go for. SAFE.
I'm gonna apologize to stephanie. I'd been talking to her a couple times on myspace, and didn't immediately say hello to her. Again, because i wasn't alone.
In other news"
Work's been ok now for a couple of days.
I'm terrified of going back to school. (even though I've been told I'll be love fodder for some young coed)
Cars are running alright (can't say i'll take my rabbit to school yet. Maybe if i get it painted....we'll see.)
i'm gonna cut this one short.... later