lycoris

Well my strip club cherry has been popped!

Saturday I slept in only to realise when I woke up that I had to be at the meeting place at 1pm to get a ride to the bachelorette party. I was late, but fortunately they spotted me (thanks to my blue hair) as they drove past. I hop in and off to Brampton we went. I got to meet some of the bride-to-be's friends, and they're my kind of people. We played silly bachelorette party games, but with this crowd, we forgot about the twelve year old boy sitting quietly in the corner. He saw and heard much more than he should have.

After nibblies, cupcakes and pizza, we were off to The Foxxes Den to see some men take their clothes off for money. It was fun overall, but I much prefer the Suicide Boys. Most of the men weren't really to my taste, though there were a couple of fine specimens. No skinny emo boys, unfortunately. Many of those had nice round bums that needed spanking. I was very tempted to ask if I could pay for the guys to do stuff to each other instead of to me. One guy had stylized people tattoed which looked like a tribal pattern from far away which was quite flattering! The bachelorette insisted we all go on stage with him for "personal attention" and instructed me to stick a fiver deep into my bra. Well it was so deep the guy didn't see it. Oops.

The place was packed and it was hot in there. After a little while, some of us took our tops off. One of the party was wearing a strapless dress and had no bra on, so to help her out, we then took our bras off as well. The bouncer came over and told us to cover up, as "the owner could get in trouble." This is complete bullshit as it's perfectly legal in Ontario for women to be topless in public. The waiters kept asking us "what happened?" since they were apparently enjoying the view. It really pissed me off and killed my buzz. Which wasn't very high, considering my Bacardi Breezer was $8.50!! We stayed only long enough after that for the bachelorette to get a lap dance from the tattooed guy, and I really wished I was wearing high heels so I could have stepped on his back with them. And spanked him.

Next we headed downstairs to The Sword and Shield to watch the ladies take their clothes off. It was much colder and basically dead. Our party's arrival meant that women outnumbered men in the audience by quite a bit! We sat down right at the stage, ordered our drinks, and proceeded to get rowdy. The DJ was appreciative and kept taunting the silent men by saying things like: "haven't any of you brought your own pair of balls?" Half the dancers were great, but half were quite unenthusiastic. One of our party went up on stage for some "personal attention" (much hotter than what we got upstairs!) and was later asked by a guy in the club if she was on next. That would have been a challenge with her outfit.

It was bizzarre that our presence was actually appreciated downstairs, while upstairs we were made to feel unwelcome and uncomfortable. I even found out later that some people in our party had paid our waiter to loose his snotty attitude.

We made it back to the sister of the bride's place for 2am, but was it time for sleep? No! These crazy people wanted hamburgers from McDonald's! I curled up on my corner of carpet and it must have been well after 3am when everyone had returned, eaten and stopped talking. Then the snoring.

I really did have fun, when all was said and done!

August 1st: I'm off to Chicago tonight! See y'all next week!