luridsky

I found this earlier tonight in a book. . what book I don't rememeber but I absoloutly fell in love with it. Something about it just struck me and I cried. . I actually cried. I guess it just reminded me of him and how much I did for him how much of my life I actually stopped living just so he could live a little more. I must say although I'm glad it's over I will never forget the way it felt to hear him whisper I love you every night.

little dark girl with
kind eyes
when it comes time to
use the knife
I won't flinch and
I won't blame
you,
as I drive along the shore alone
as the palms wave,
the ugly heavy palms,
as the living does not arrive
as the dead do not leave,
I won't blame you,
instead
I will remember the kisses
our lips raw with love
and how you gave me
everything you had
and how I
offered you what was left of
me,
and I will remember your small room
the feel of you
the light in the window
your records
your books
our morning coffee
our noons our nights
our bodies spilled together
sleeping
the tiny flowing currents
immediate and forever
your leg my leg
your arm my arm
your smile and the warmth
of you
who made me laugh
again.

- bukowski.