Another hotel room, another town, another day goes by and you just wonder what it's really all about. The move to jersey was supposed to stop all this, but alas, I work for a company born in HELL that has spread it's evil upon the world. Today Baltimore, tomorrow home, Sunday back to Baltimore for a week and more of the same. More lies, more decit, more empty nights alone in a different hotel, more soul sucking by a company that thrives on my life essence. You'd think I'd just look for another job, right? Well, that would be my plan if I was ever home long enough to do so. There may be a slim ray of hope, though. The shop in Newark maybe open by the end of this month and if so, this traveling circus in Hell will come to an end. Maybe if I'm home I'll feel better. Maybe if I'm home every night I can start taking the classes at the Learning Annex that I want to take. Maybe I could actually meet people and form friendships. Maybe, life wouldn't seem so bleak and empty all the time. Maybe I would feel like I was actually accomplishing something and becoming the person I can picture my self as. Maybe I would find someone or they would find me. Maybe we could fall in love and start a life together. Or maybe I would just be at peace knowing that any of this was possible. Maybe........
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and they suck.
you're gonna find that mentality in recovery and anywhere else. and they are NOT good people to be around.
yeah, i laid the tile a few weeks back, grouted it actually, not with grout, which wears away too quick(it was cheap crap), but with caulk. silicone caulk, and that's what i was scraping off. i do a lot of handy work. kinda gotta be self-reliant. *shrug*
i *love* ice cream. does that count?