lucidd

[rebirth]
there it is i swear to fuck.
what?
that thing right there, its like glowing.
for real? where?
hmm, maybe its just me.
maybe its just everyone else.
no seriously, you dont see it?
no. what is it?
its like, awareness or something.
umm, weird.
yeah i know.
see if you can get it.
naw, ill let it be. itll come to me when...
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salvation

leaving for the NC tomorrow. thanksgiving w/ family and all that. catch up on the books ive been meaning to read. get some quality time in with my GBA too. i had to play w/ my cat extra since ill be gone, and now ive got a fresh variety of cuts and bites whose stings will remind me of lil moto the misfit. i...
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saw waking life last nite, its title alone is very appropriate for my current state of life. the sleep plan continues well. the trick for me is to stay up late when i HAVE to wake up early, almost like a shock treatment. just get too little sleep until 7-8 hours is glorious.
ive been trying to work hard, but after a certain amount of...
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okay so coffee doesnt work for me, it seems my stomach just cant handle it. i had some this morn, and still dont feel great about it. this strikes me as too bad, cause i like the coffee and the sweet sweet artifical energy it provides. total sleep last nite: 5 hours. i overdid the reduction, but feh.

oh this sleep
must be defeated
before ive bled
my life to deletion

my nemesis is one called somnus
the evil deity of the subconscious toys with me, imprisoning me without my consent. try as i may my fight falters, and asleep i lay too long. i shall rise against and overcome and triumph and see success. if only i could open my eyes, stand...
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le tigre fuckin wooo.
sorry anthesis, dont wanna rub it in. but they rocked. chadwick and i contest they should have played a longer set, but still. i wanna go to a big fuckin outdoor show where i can lay in the grass and smoke a joint, then get up and rock out until i wanted to smoke again. kinda like that ozzfest once. i...
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i was awakened at 5:21 by a knoc knock knocking at my door. it took me a while to figure out where clothes were and put them on. by then the knocker was back in his car in my parking spot. curious i called out, hello? after a pause they asked about someone or something i had not heard of before. sorry i said, and...
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subtle mediocrity exudes from my very being
a placeholder for greatness not yet tapped
i know i see things differently
but how well do i see them, really
what good is vision without action
am i foolish
am i lucky
or am i trapped
in my contentment
the sun sets
and only in this darkness
do i feel at home
its really not that dark...
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[time to rant]
holy crap am i burnt out with this damn tomb im modeling. ive been unwrapping and texturing the past two days and i have to setlle for it not looking as good as i want because theres just no time. this one class has successfully monopolized all of my homework time. ive already worked 14 hours on it this week alone. i...
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ack i was gonna write something but it turned to crap.

hmm imagine that, troubles with the voting in florida? who couldve seen that comin. crap im all worried about the election. its not like itll make a personal impact on me very much either way, but bush just makes us look like an ass. and im freakin hippie.
progress on my website! its not much but its all i needed to feel compelled to work...
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[and allow me to reiterate]
enlightenment through a hazy sequence of happenings.
and the sun has begun to rise.
its 7am. i didnt mean to stay up this late.
now i just wish someone was up to going to denny's cause i wants me some breakfast.
its lite out and thats confusing. i almost want to say fuck it and just go for the day,...
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