Well apparently, i'm psycho i'm having a problem in my head that i can't control...... but i really can't seem to figure it out 
it is something that literally makes me snap inside and it really is a horrible thing 
so much fucking anger !!!!!!!
and it's well i don't know what it is but its gonna end up killing me if i don't nip it ? my life line.....just snip it!!! wish it wasn't that way and i wish i could explain it to myself ? maybe it will come to me in time but do i have time ? when they say "all i got is time" well do any of us?
i think that i'm running low on time and time is clawing at this neck that i still own? how long can one own their neck before it's butchered on the block?
how does a person gain control of their destiny? Grasp
the future or a way out of a hole thats been dug for you since birth? How do you escape that hole called a grave? everyone has a hole dug for them..... face it
Death is certain....................Life is NOT! ! it's inevitable, i was born to die, as we all were ya don't be so certain that it's not coming to me soon ?
i prolly deserve all that i get just from the snapping sessions i've had.... i want to say sorry to my girlfriend though cause she has put up with me and i've done some really bad thing to her and for that i prolly will burn in HELL but for myself i need to say
" I'M SORRY J I DON'T EVER MEAN TO HURT YOU AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THAT IT FUCKING HURTS, IT'S LIKE SOMEONE ELSE IS CONTROLING MY THOUGHTS & ACTIONS"
and that person is NOT me baby! i don't know if i'll ever tell ya to read the journal for 3/22/03 but if you do read it then you know that i do care about you & llove you
i care more about you then i do about myself! and that my darling.....is a fact! i've never been one to fall head over heels in
love but god dammit it happened....& i told myself to keep a safe distance from girls with an excellent personallity and if they're pretty too? forget it you're done
and who in the fuck pops up
ya you did! the girl i
have been affraid of my whole life, the one who gives you butterflies in your stomach the one who makes you write shit like this even if it does make you look stupid! i don't write for "other people" i write for myself, and if you stumble across & read it well then you actually can kind of see what a pyscho i am?
like demons in my head, i'm like day and night, good & evil.............i'm WACKO .... but i know it !! at some point in my life i was a really good writer but these days i actually have to be that person to write and lately? well i don't know the person i've become i'm like a stranger to my own body as well as my own mind!
notice to self: you were just three different personallities writing this journal entry! scroll up for a
confrimation on that... yes i am fucked up! most definatly a piece of work & confused as all hell cause you don't know how to react when you are faced with this (i.e. how do you deal with it when it happens) you are someone else and i like to think that i am in charge here but you keep putting me back
in the dark....... are we? awwww don't be mad............. get some help?
well ive said it before a pice of glass jutting from your neck isn't my idea of cute? but it would be an inprovement in personality!!
it is something that literally makes me snap inside and it really is a horrible thing so much fucking anger !!!!!!!
and it's well i don't know what it is but its gonna end up killing me if i don't nip it ? my life line.....just snip it!!! wish it wasn't that way and i wish i could explain it to myself ? maybe it will come to me in time but do i have time ? when they say "all i got is time" well do any of us?
i think that i'm running low on time and time is clawing at this neck that i still own? how long can one own their neck before it's butchered on the block?
how does a person gain control of their destiny? Grasp
the future or a way out of a hole thats been dug for you since birth? How do you escape that hole called a grave? everyone has a hole dug for them..... face it
Death is certain....................Life is NOT! ! it's inevitable, i was born to die, as we all were
ya don't be so certain that it's not coming to me soon ?
i prolly deserve all that i get just from the snapping sessions i've had.... i want to say sorry to my girlfriend though cause she has put up with me and i've done some really bad thing to her and for that i prolly will burn in HELL but for myself i need to say
" I'M SORRY J I DON'T EVER MEAN TO HURT YOU AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THAT IT FUCKING HURTS, IT'S LIKE SOMEONE ELSE IS CONTROLING MY THOUGHTS & ACTIONS"
and that person is NOT me baby! i don't know if i'll ever tell ya to read the journal for 3/22/03 but if you do read it then you know that i do care about you & llove you
i care more about you then i do about myself! and that my darling.....is a fact! i've never been one to fall head over heels in
love but god dammit it happened....& i told myself to keep a safe distance from girls with an excellent personallity and if they're pretty too? forget it you're done
and who in the fuck pops up
ya you did! the girl i
have been affraid of my whole life, the one who gives you butterflies in your stomach the one who makes you write shit like this even if it does make you look stupid! i don't write for "other people" i write for myself, and if you stumble across & read it well then you actually can kind of see what a pyscho i am?
like demons in my head, i'm like day and night, good & evil.............i'm WACKO .... but i know it !! at some point in my life i was a really good writer but these days i actually have to be that person to write and lately? well i don't know the person i've become i'm like a stranger to my own body as well as my own mind!
notice to self: you were just three different personallities writing this journal entry! scroll up for a
confrimation on that... yes i am fucked up! most definatly a piece of work & confused as all hell cause you don't know how to react when you are faced with this (i.e. how do you deal with it when it happens) you are someone else and i like to think that i am in charge here but you keep putting me back
in the dark.......
are we? awwww don't be mad............. get some help?
well ive said it before a pice of glass jutting from your neck isn't my idea of cute? but it would be an inprovement in personality!!