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lornemir

Member Since 2003

Followers 1 Following 2

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Tuesday Jun 03, 2003

Jun 3, 2003
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This past week has been nuts. Saturday I had a very very long talk with my girlfriend and we both decided to go 100 percent all out. We decided to sell all our shit, move in with my mom for a few months and save money. In September we're gonna buy a couple of tickets to Scotland and see how we can live there.

I have 2 thoughts about this. One - I have nothing to lose. I really want to try to make a go of staying with my girlfriend. My job is OK but it's really not what I see myself doing for much longer. I loved living in Europe when I did and I may as well try again. Plus nothing would make me happier than being the person to take her to Scotland.

The other thought - I have a lot to lose. My job, although I complain about it, is pretty cool. I work for fucking Playboy. Not many people can say that. I'm trying to move to the production departments and it's really hard to move around in Entertainment when you're not in it. If I leave I'll have a bitch of a time getting back in it.

I picture myself in the first place living in Scotland and wandering around, albeit broke, for months at a time. Maybe get a job in a pub again. Or I picture myself alone in LA renting some nice room in a big house in silverlake or whereer - partying my ass off and having a lot more money (since I won't have to support the girlfriend).

Of course it probably won't be like any of these pictures I'm seeing. The thing is I have this one last chance and I need to try it. But the other part of me says that after 4 years I need to get off on my own and I'll always regret it if I don't. So what am I gonna do? Well I have several months before we'll leave so I'm going to move in with my girlfriend into mom's place for a bit and see how it goes. Oh kick ass thing, she has some family friend who lives in London so we'll have a place to stay for a while before we figure out what to do there. Believe me, trying to find a job without a work permit will suck. We WILL be broke. I've done it before. I know a college degree ain't gonna mean shit there. I will be happy bartending but they don't make NEARLY the cash they make here. Just thing about how much US bartenders make, now take away ALL the tips. See what I'm saying? Tips are almost unheard of in Britain and when you get them they're usually symbolic. You might get a buck a day in tips. But fuck it, I don't need money hehe.

So am I crazy?

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