So i have a new question for everyone.
my best friend has been with her boyfriend going on five years now and she cheated on him with some other guy. She still wants to be with him says it was a mistake and it's over with and done and just wants to be with him. Now whe wonders if she should tell him all about it so they can start over.
Here's how i feel about situations like this; I think if it really was a mistake and you still want to be with this guy/girl it's really pretty selfish to tell the other person about it. Is that just me? Because really not very many people agree with me on this, including my husband.
But if you really think about it,
You cheat on your lover and YOU feel really guilty and YOU feel like a bad person you want to tell them so that YOU can get it off YOUR chest because YOU feel like YOU can't be a good lover with this secret and YOU want to do the right thing.
This is pretty much the same argument give or take a few words that I hear from everyone in this situation. How many thems are there compared to you's in this argument. Is it really whats good for the other person or is it what's good for you? The other person is heartbroken and it won't really help the relationship because sure you have honesty, but no trust (funny how that works). You are the only one that feels better. So really it was all about you in the first place, YOU cheated now YOU want to be punished to feel better about things. I think the need for punishment comes from some burried christian influence that's still haunting too many people because face it, it was the cornerstone of western civilization as we know it today. But it's time to evolve past those selfish needs to be forgiven and get over it. Keep it to yourself.
I don't know anyone ever been in this situation, I never have so maybe my advice is bunk.
To tell or not to tell?
my best friend has been with her boyfriend going on five years now and she cheated on him with some other guy. She still wants to be with him says it was a mistake and it's over with and done and just wants to be with him. Now whe wonders if she should tell him all about it so they can start over.
Here's how i feel about situations like this; I think if it really was a mistake and you still want to be with this guy/girl it's really pretty selfish to tell the other person about it. Is that just me? Because really not very many people agree with me on this, including my husband.
But if you really think about it,
You cheat on your lover and YOU feel really guilty and YOU feel like a bad person you want to tell them so that YOU can get it off YOUR chest because YOU feel like YOU can't be a good lover with this secret and YOU want to do the right thing.
This is pretty much the same argument give or take a few words that I hear from everyone in this situation. How many thems are there compared to you's in this argument. Is it really whats good for the other person or is it what's good for you? The other person is heartbroken and it won't really help the relationship because sure you have honesty, but no trust (funny how that works). You are the only one that feels better. So really it was all about you in the first place, YOU cheated now YOU want to be punished to feel better about things. I think the need for punishment comes from some burried christian influence that's still haunting too many people because face it, it was the cornerstone of western civilization as we know it today. But it's time to evolve past those selfish needs to be forgiven and get over it. Keep it to yourself.
I don't know anyone ever been in this situation, I never have so maybe my advice is bunk.
To tell or not to tell?
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have u seen the new 'Manson Family' or 'Toolbox Murders'? i LOVED both of those.