lorensoth

Its almost amusing to read the last post...

"and I don't know how I will deal with the worst outcome..."

Well the worst outcome has happened, my grandmother passed away at around seven this evening...
I was just getting to class at the time...

I feel numb... every Christmas and Easter I can ever remember was at Grandma's house...
Now what will happen I wonder...

I kept telling myself she wouldn't let herself die of some sickness in a hospital...
I kept thinking she would get better even though everyone else said she might not make it...

I wouldn't go see her at the hospital.. I didn't want possibly the last memories I have of her to be with her in a sick bed at a hospital...
I remember walking her to the car a few months back, her eyesight was so bad she could hardly see and asked who was walking her to the car.
...She was so happy it was me as she hugged my arm, I joked about giving a guided tour of the driveway as we slowly walked to the car.
Ill always have that memory with me, how happy she was it was me...