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longblackbangs

Auburn, CA

Member Since 2003

Followers 20 Following 16

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Saturday Apr 10, 2004

Apr 9, 2004
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And times not poison but if you drink it all you'll die.
So let's just sip it real slow, yeah, we can nurse it all night.
Try to believe that once its gone they will pour another round and we'll come back to life.

C. Oberst

For someone with such strong agnostic beliefs I realized I'm not doing such a good job living my life like it quite possibly the only thing I will ever have.

I have never denied the fact that I put things off and procrastinated when it came to the small things, but it has become very clear that I do it with my life as a whole as well. When I was little I always liked the concept for that Pink Floyd song "Time". I would scream it from my room, "No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun...". My Dad would peak in and just grin. Half happy that his son was listening to good music and half knowing even though I understood the concept I couldn't fully experience it for myself at the time

But now I sit back and realize that I am still waiting for the gun to go off. I always looked at my life as "we'll when I get out of school I'm gonna..." But if I can't throw myself out there to do something that possibly could end up in failure now, what makes me think I'm gonna do it just because there is a degree in my hand?!?! My major is what I truely want to spend my life doing but waiting for graduation to actually do anything is a pathetic excuse for a mediocre life in the meantime.

This isn't the fucking test run for anything and I'm not sure where I got the idea that it was. There is no good excuse to not make music when I know like-minded people who want to, or to not put more time into things I want to do to achieve the "Fantasy" in my profile. This whole coyness and shyness shit has long overstayed it's welcome.

Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years has got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun

R. Waters
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
james:
good, well when you get your shit together i want to see the work.
thats a funny response to the whole exploiting women, its like when my parents used to ask me what i was doing whe23n. 0i went out in igh school and i would be like "smoking crack in an alley". Its what they want to hear right?
Apr 12, 2004
yurikoviolet:
if we become "real life" friends I'll get you involved with so many half baked schemes and projects that you will sometimes miss apathy. I have to tell myself to slow down. Yesterday I let loose and played Secret of Mana for an hour. It was bliss.
y.v.
Apr 13, 2004

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