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Hello babez!

After finding all the wonderful blog topics I decided to challenge myself, play some catch up, and start from the top of the list.

What inspired me to become a suicide girl:

Let me start by introducing myself, I'm 22, a taurus (stubborn as hell) and I've lived in Washington state my entire life, and yes, all they say about us in Seattle is true. I drink too much coffee, smoke too many cigarettes, wear too much black, and listen to all those indie "I hate the world." bands.

I've always loved the idea of the entertainment industry. Pleasing a crowd, making people happy and putting on a show. From a young age I was always doing little videos. Singing, dancing, all kinds of theatrics. With love of a spotlight you would think natural born confidence would follow. For me this wasn't the case. As I bloomed into a young adult I could see my insecurities growing, a self hatred and emotional instability that controlled my every move. At 14 years old I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, an eating disorder and body dis morphia. My dreams of modeling slowly started to slip away. I've grown up a lot from the wild days of my teens and have really learned to understand my diseases and control them. I won't say I'm better though, everyday is a struggle to get out of bed and face the mirror. As my modeling dreams slipped away I found a new love in art. With a pencil in my hand the world slowly slipped away and I found peace in my mind. I took the ideas I came up with and pieced them together into art on my body. Tattoos. Like hanging wall art onto the vessel that is my body.

I first discovered SG when a friend invited me to go to the burlesque show in Seattle at El Corazon. I was mesmerized. These girls were confident, sexy, energetic and all unique in their own way. They were a beautiful fuck you to the cookie cutter image that streams in society today. Tattooed, naked, carefree. In that instant I knew I had to be apart of the SG girl family. I remember when Katherine Suicide was asking the crowd who wanted to come on stage and strut their stuff, and there I was in the back jumping up and down hoping to be chosen. Fast forward a couple years and here I am, chosen as a Hopeful. That same feeling of love and excitement running through me as it was that night.

So what inspired me to be a suicide girl? Whether I wake up one morning hating myself, or loving myself, with SG it doesn't matter. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. There is no cookie cutter image. What appeals to one person may not appeal to the next, perfection doesn't exist. So on those days when I wake up and don't like girl I see in the mirror, I'm happy I have a place like SG to remind me that everyone is beautiful, and everyone is loved! The image that they are creating for women everywhere to be badass, be comfortable with your sexual being, and be comfortable in your own skin is fucking empowering.

THAT is what inspired me to be a suicide girl.

Here I go .. Blooming.