livingoutloud

In what will more than likely prove to be be one of my more brilliant or more disasterous decisions as yet, I have decided to move back to NC.
Well, more than decided.
Its already done.

It's a decision that has been met with both celebration and critisim by others, but has been repeatedly affirmed in my own experience. I'm happier here. For now at least.
Or maybe I just wasn't happy there. I admit, I went to NY for all the wrong reasons. I went because I should, or rather, because other people thought I should....and I wanted to make them proud. I didn't used to be that type of girl. I just sort of fell into it. Its amazing how once someone else starts to think amazing things of you, weather you agree with them or not, you want to create that reality for them. That was wrong and now I'm working on not only discoving what I truly want, but also discovering my own damn path to achieving it.

I got a day job. I found a kickass roomate. I'm designing another show and starting to stick my nose into another regional theatre. I'm looking into other grad school options. Schools which can provide me with a sound education and an enviroment I can be happy in.
But more importantly, I see green stuff and flowering trees everywhere I turn. I sit with old friends and watch leisurely sunsets. I bike thru the gardens to run my errands. I see the stars at night. I sit around bonfires with bearded drum-playing mountian boys and I get lost driving on backroads. It feels so wonderful and I appreciate it all in a way I never did before.
I have no regrets.