well i finally get to update! for some reason i haven't been able to update for a few days..stupid thing kept kicking me off the net...gggrrrr 
anyways...not a lot has been going on these past few days. my goal to start back up at the gym hasn't happened which i'm really pissed off about. all to my own fault i know so i can't blame anyone but myself.
i finally go back to my normal job next week which really sucks. i hate my normal job...a boring secretary. i've been acting in other positions for the last 7 months and it has been great! i am espcially dreading being around the people on the floor i'm on. i don't mind my immediate people that i deal with...but everyone else are fuck wits and are constantly trying to pick people apart etc etc. in general it is petty politics of the office.
had a fight with my mum about my weight the other nite. telling me about how i should be doing this and doing that. what the fuck does she know about being big. it just is frustrating. we were talking and it came up about how i would like to start going to the gym with her...you know...same time...motivation cause someone else is going and stuff. all she could whine about is how i am in a gym and how i never stick to stuff and that is why i'm so big and crap crap crap. even tho i told her i'm not happy where i am in my gym...it isn't a great gym and the people are really nagative...she still went on. thanks for the vote of encouragement mum!
i wish there was an easy way to do it tho. get the weight off. i know there isn't...and i know i'm kidding myself and i know it really isn't that hard. but when you are pretty unfit and have no energy and are tired all the time (i don't sleep very well) it is really hard to get motivated. i just wish i could do it. i know i can...but why don't i..? BLEH...well that was depressing that paragraph.
what else. uuummmm...the guy that i like i have a feeling that he is back with his gf. i knew there wasn't a chance but i still feel icky about it. just once i'd like some interest my way.
anyways....thats all for now. a really downish entry i know...but you get that i guess
laters
kirst
anyways...not a lot has been going on these past few days. my goal to start back up at the gym hasn't happened which i'm really pissed off about. all to my own fault i know so i can't blame anyone but myself.
i finally go back to my normal job next week which really sucks. i hate my normal job...a boring secretary. i've been acting in other positions for the last 7 months and it has been great! i am espcially dreading being around the people on the floor i'm on. i don't mind my immediate people that i deal with...but everyone else are fuck wits and are constantly trying to pick people apart etc etc. in general it is petty politics of the office.
had a fight with my mum about my weight the other nite. telling me about how i should be doing this and doing that. what the fuck does she know about being big. it just is frustrating. we were talking and it came up about how i would like to start going to the gym with her...you know...same time...motivation cause someone else is going and stuff. all she could whine about is how i am in a gym and how i never stick to stuff and that is why i'm so big and crap crap crap. even tho i told her i'm not happy where i am in my gym...it isn't a great gym and the people are really nagative...she still went on. thanks for the vote of encouragement mum!
i wish there was an easy way to do it tho. get the weight off. i know there isn't...and i know i'm kidding myself and i know it really isn't that hard. but when you are pretty unfit and have no energy and are tired all the time (i don't sleep very well) it is really hard to get motivated. i just wish i could do it. i know i can...but why don't i..? BLEH...well that was depressing that paragraph.
what else. uuummmm...the guy that i like i have a feeling that he is back with his gf. i knew there wasn't a chance but i still feel icky about it. just once i'd like some interest my way.
anyways....thats all for now. a really downish entry i know...but you get that i guess
laters
kirst
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
And think about finding ways to calmly say to your mum: "Look, none of what you're saying and doing is going to help. If you want to help me, listen to me and then talk with me about what I have to say."
My guess is she'll fire up again, in which case you have to stay calm and continue talking reasonably. I've seen fractious mother-daughter relationships, and sometimes it's the daughter who has to be the adult ...
Curious profile pic, b.t.w.