So, I don't know if it's the whole holiday season or what but I'm feeling really fucking shitty. The only time I'm really happy is when I'm talking to Evan....or high....or drunk. And although that's fun to get wasted, it's a good way to isolate yourself. And the way I've been feeling, I really shouldn't be by myself. I actually caught myself thinking today, "I'll be suprised if I make it through christmas." What the fuck is wrong with me? I just want to be happy. Stop crying. I want a car. I want a job. I want to be able to buy all my friends gifts for christmas. They've all been so good to me and I just feel like a jerk.
Please, someone tell me this is all going to get better....and mean it.
Please, someone tell me this is all going to get better....and mean it.
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and know that the mind is a tricky, fucked up thing that makes people feel weird/sad for no particular reason other than for some reason it secreted more of one chemical than another one day, and the next day will do something else. things WILL get better, you sound like me last winter, and things got better for me.
you're a doll