lindex

So I just got a call from my sister telling me my mother has some sort of liver cancer or something and that she doesn't know how much longer she has to live, I told my sister to wish her well.
I admitted to my sister that I couldn't really care enough to call her and talk to her about her condition, I feel like I'm being a pick and that I'm in the wrong for not really giving a damn, but I was abandoned and so I can justify not caring.
I would rather be polite and spare her my real feeling that would state that I have been expecting something like this and that I wouldn't put it past to lie about shit like this.
It was her life choices that caused her this malady, and it was her life choices that cause us (her children) to have fucked up lives, so do we really owe her? I don't really think so.
Its not to say that wish her to die, but to me its the same as anyone I hear about going through a life threatening disease, its like watching the news for me.
Im probably being a heartless prick, but to-do anything else, I just couldnt stomach it.
I will see how I feel tomorrow when I find out just exactly how long she has to live, maybe my mercy will grow, but right now I am cold.