lily

I didn't mean to run from you. I just was so scared to lose my freedom. anyone who has sat in a jail cell for more than a few days knows, actually more than a few weeks knows what the fuck i mean about that. I put out my thumb and jumped in the first car that pulled to the side, leaving you both worried on the side of the road. sorry you could never understand. sorry i had to slap you, don't follow me when i'm feeling crazy.
Maybe i'll have a felony warrant out for my arrest on wednesday, maybe i don't care. maybe i'll go face up to it. maybe they'll delay it. But what i want is to just smile and forget sometimes. someone opened their door to me that morning to comfort my broken hands. I hung out with all the old mexicans in the bronx at my meth clinic. They were talking shit about the government so i convinced them to go to the protest/riots going on right here in NYC. They smiled at me. "But don't alot of people get arrested?" see thats a big reason people from the ghetto won't show up to defend their rights, because they are used to getting arrested and all the white protesters are not except a small majority of street kids of all colors who knows what its like or people who come from poverty who also are aware of those barred windows that take your sunshine away. Actually i remember that was tagged on my cell wall "You'll never know dear how much i love you, until you take my sunshine away." anyways I told my mexican friends that you just gotta be fast and added with a smile "and i know you guys know how to be fast cause you're from up here." I handed them a bottle of spray paint cause they are better taggers than me. thats where i'm going now. say a little prayer so i don't get arrested. Dude my cute ass fag is on the bed filling up a syringe with his blood and spraying it on his white shirt. he's fucking crazy. i love my friends.
Love, Lily