lily

this is why god invented chainsmoking. It's gotten me through all kinds of withdrawls, physical/emotional etc... and cigarettes don't get me fucked up in such a way to affect my judgement...

living for the future is difficult when you've gotten used to living for today/now but it does work... maintain, ride out the bullshit...

you can do it; you're stronger than it.

Yeah I feel for you and I don't drink or do any drugs anymore and its kind of depressing. You're just kind of numb and quiet and there's no withdrawal but there's no connection either. Just nothing. I remember seeing crack whores when I lived in Brooklynand I'd cross the street to just be on the other side from them. They were only in their late twenties or early thirties and looked wasted, anorexic - the things they said to the guys walking down the street made me want to puke. Its better to just be silent for the next fifty years. That's what I'm doing or who knows. Day by day or rolll the dice. lol. Good luck either way.