lily

in asheville, NC, real windy.
need to get further down south but this piece of shit van keeps breaking and i have no money in my pockets, just some dirt and lint. i've been stealing gas, i hate gas stations, actually i hate cars in general, but i like fixing them, i've been fixing it myself. wonder bitch.
hitting the starter with a hammer.
my aunt jumped 200 ft into a rocky quarry a few days ago. she was like my mom, cause i never really had one. well i had a few but not a real one. she was always real crazy. blood on the floor and shit. and my aunt, she always wanted to die. she used to teach me about the birds, she loved birds, wanted to fly just like the birds when she stepped off that ledge drunk on monday she learned to fly. silly bird. she's still alive. almost not. her daddy is going to visit her in the hospital, he used to touch her late at night, me too, he's a real dirty bastard. ugly dead eyes. real small dick. if she dies i'm going to expose him at her funeral. I've always felt that if people want to die that they should be able to, but now i feel real selfish cause i need her.
I'll be gone from here in a few days, this reality, this state,this dream, this train.
Love, Lily