Okay so I have poison sumac on my ass.. want to know how I got it? Ash and her stupid ideas...sigh.
Okay so she and the boy broke up a couple weeks ago and she is hell bent that hes been screwing this other girl while he was with her so she wanted to confront him and when I say confront I mean she wants to stalk him without him knowing. So after work yesterday night she tells me we are going to his house to see if the other girl is with him. So I agree to go with her not knowing what Im getting myself into. We get to his apartment and I go to walk up the front steps and she goes NOOOOOOOOOO! STOP! Were going around back. I'm like huh? How do you know hes even around back? She goes No.. we are gonna climb the tree thats in the common area and spy on him from there so we can see if "the bitch" is with him. Im like Ash you gotta be kidding me. Nope she grabs my hand and off we go to the back common ground. I get back there and see the tree its this grumpy old oak tree with vines running up it that looks alot like ivy. I think nothing of it I get to the base of the tree and Im like Jesus Ash if I woulda known we were tree climbing I woulda worn pants I'll wait for you down here and shes like No come up here with me. So we argued for another 5 minutes and finally I gave in and said ok. Im wearing a shorter skirt and tank and docs luckily.So I get my fat ass up there by the grace of god it took me like 10 trys to haul my fat ass to the first branch but I did it damnit. I almost wet myself laughing with Ash and her monkeylike skills taking the branches with ease. So I climb up the tree and rest atop a branch straddling it. Im scooting accross it trying to get a better view of this guys apartment but all we can really see is his back deck and inside about 3 feet to his living room So we are deciding if we should move up higher when guess what motherfucker lands on me not 1 but 3 fucking japanese beetles. As most of you know I have a huge phobia about beetles so Im like hyperventalating hitting my arm against the tree branch I couldnt even scream I was so scared. So I started thrashing around in the tree which isnt a good idea and yep my ass fell out of the fuckin tree. Ash jumped down to help me make sure I wasnt dead and I just told her to fuckin lets go. Rubbing my head in the car and laughing about it cause this shit only happens to us. I start scratchin between my legs. I lift my skirt up and it looks like a page of braille. Like a bright red page right outta gone with the wind braille. Omg I got poison sumac on my ass cheeks, my inner thighs, behind my knee caps and alittle on my arms.
I swear all of this just to see if asshole was with a girl.
Sigh This sucks major ass. I hate nature.
Anyways Have a good humpday!
Now go out and piss on a tree for me.
15 days so far
Okay so she and the boy broke up a couple weeks ago and she is hell bent that hes been screwing this other girl while he was with her so she wanted to confront him and when I say confront I mean she wants to stalk him without him knowing. So after work yesterday night she tells me we are going to his house to see if the other girl is with him. So I agree to go with her not knowing what Im getting myself into. We get to his apartment and I go to walk up the front steps and she goes NOOOOOOOOOO! STOP! Were going around back. I'm like huh? How do you know hes even around back? She goes No.. we are gonna climb the tree thats in the common area and spy on him from there so we can see if "the bitch" is with him. Im like Ash you gotta be kidding me. Nope she grabs my hand and off we go to the back common ground. I get back there and see the tree its this grumpy old oak tree with vines running up it that looks alot like ivy. I think nothing of it I get to the base of the tree and Im like Jesus Ash if I woulda known we were tree climbing I woulda worn pants I'll wait for you down here and shes like No come up here with me. So we argued for another 5 minutes and finally I gave in and said ok. Im wearing a shorter skirt and tank and docs luckily.So I get my fat ass up there by the grace of god it took me like 10 trys to haul my fat ass to the first branch but I did it damnit. I almost wet myself laughing with Ash and her monkeylike skills taking the branches with ease. So I climb up the tree and rest atop a branch straddling it. Im scooting accross it trying to get a better view of this guys apartment but all we can really see is his back deck and inside about 3 feet to his living room So we are deciding if we should move up higher when guess what motherfucker lands on me not 1 but 3 fucking japanese beetles. As most of you know I have a huge phobia about beetles so Im like hyperventalating hitting my arm against the tree branch I couldnt even scream I was so scared. So I started thrashing around in the tree which isnt a good idea and yep my ass fell out of the fuckin tree. Ash jumped down to help me make sure I wasnt dead and I just told her to fuckin lets go. Rubbing my head in the car and laughing about it cause this shit only happens to us. I start scratchin between my legs. I lift my skirt up and it looks like a page of braille. Like a bright red page right outta gone with the wind braille. Omg I got poison sumac on my ass cheeks, my inner thighs, behind my knee caps and alittle on my arms.
I swear all of this just to see if asshole was with a girl.
Sigh This sucks major ass. I hate nature.
Anyways Have a good humpday!
Now go out and piss on a tree for me.
15 days so far
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Day!
[Edited on Jul 07, 2004 9:24PM]
you should try that next time.
at least then it is a badge of courage and whatnot...
not just a crazy bitch of a friend.
hehe