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likeclockwork

San Francisco

Member Since 2004

Followers 6 Following 27

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Thursday Dec 09, 2004

Dec 9, 2004
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On my way to school today, sweating bullets about my finals, I realized that at this time of year each year I'm in the same spot. Not entirely screwed in any particular class (I can usually anticipate those and drop, what a strategy) but relying on strong finishes to come out ok. I never sweat particularly hard about any single test beeing too difficult, its just that I never seem to work hard enough throughout the year to a) have a secure grade regardless of the final or b) to feel satisfied that I gave a class my best shot. This feeling sucks. I hate wallowing in the theoretical. I do great in school for how fundamentally bad my approach is (attendence and overall engagement lacking something fierce). Its almost like giving myself an out so in the end I can only assess blame on the things I do, not on my intellectual merit. In any case, tonight will be spent writing 2 and perhaps 3 papers for my eastern philosophy class.

Anyways, back to the drive. In the middle of stressing I passed a Boulder Sheriff's van, complete with caged windows and convicts sitting inside (presumably being taken to jail). For a moments time, I felt good that I was living my life not their's. In the next moment, I kinda wished I was in that van. Nah, fuck jail.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
babybeezer:
I tend to have an "assigned reading is optional" attitude about most of my classes. Then again, most of the classes with assigned reading that I take are G.E.s which are a joke.
Dec 10, 2004
babybeezer:
hey, it's your woman
Dec 13, 2004

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