lexie

This is one of my new favorite pick up lines.

Hey Baby! I'd like to use your thighs as earmuffs.

I bet that would get me some points with the ladies. Do you have any good cheesy pick up lines? Spill it, noww!

Now before picture time. I have a story.

While out and about today I decided to stop at Burger King and get a whopper, why? Because I love them and all their disgustingness. Once I got home and began to eat my whopper, I noticed that the large chunk of ONION ( ) located on my whopper was oddly shaped. As I investigated it more, I realized what it looked like.

A vagina. Disregard the red stuff, its ketchup you perverts.

Daily journal update photo(s):

(I deleted the second photo due to extreme scaryness on my part.)
Things to note about photos.
1. I bought that ugly brown shirt at kfart, and I like it. I wear it with black shoes and I don't care
2. My head is not that large. It seems as though my hair is eating my head.

While escorting my mom to her 5 million doctor appointments the other day, I stole a National Geographic from the hospital. Why would I do such a thing? Let me explain. It had an article, complete with pull out pretty pictures, of Great White Sharks. It also had a map pointing out where the most frequent sightings of them were. Cape Cod being one of those spots. For some reason I found this hysterical and I laughed, to the point of tears mind you, on the phone with boy over this.

I just won the most hideous cricket green leggings on eBay. I love ugly clothes. (see brown shirt above for further proof)

So taking the lead from LillithVain, who wants a valentine from me? If you email me your address (lexiecide at yahoo dot com) I will be sure to send you out a little something. And if anyone wishes to send me a valentine, that'd be super too. I like crayon drawings and mixed cds.

I stuck a crayon up my nose when I was little. It almost got stuck there.

I grew up watching horror movies. Instead of getting a babysitter, my dad would rent all sorts of gorey movies and let me watch them all night. At 5, Exorcist was my favorite.

My first 'sexual' encounter was with a female. We'd play bondage secretary. I was 10 and always the dom

I've bruised my cervix from too much lovin.

I'm a bitter little girl, who hates more than she loves. When life gives me lemons I make lemginas and spit in it.

I peed in a catbox while intoxicated at one point.

I like to run from things.

I got my car stuck in my driveway earlier today. Instead of tryin to unstickafy it, I slammed my door and yelled at it. I almost fell on my ass in the process.

aww i've interrupted happy time.

I'm going to leave you with my tits and say goodnight.