Ok, I'm a tiny bit calmer now. I'm not ok though. It's gonna a looooooong time before I'm ok again.
Anyway.....I'm in need of real man.....Anyone know any? Where are they hiding?
Now for a more important matter.....I've been a very bad & stupid grrl & now I may have lost my closest friend & it's killing me inside. I hate myself for being so stupid! I'm not going to say what I did, but it was wrong & I'm still beating myself up for it & will continue to do so for a looooong time. I need to start thinking before I open my mouth &/or do things. Eric, I'm soooo fucking sorry & I hope & pray that you will forgive me. I'll do anything (within reason) to make it up to you!!!!MetalEric, Please forgive me & let me make things right & prove to you how much your friendship means to me. Please!
And now for something more cheerful....it's time for a joke....
Dear Tide:
I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used it since the beginning of my married life, when my Mom told me it was the best. Now that I am older and going through menopause, I find it even better!
In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My unfeeling and uncaring husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was and generally started becoming a pain in the neck.
Well one thing led to another and I ended up with a lot of his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn't come out.
After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out!
In fact, the stains came out so well, that when the detectives w ho came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative.
Later, my attorney called and said that I would no longer be considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief.
I thank you, once again, for having such a great product. Well, gotta go now, I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people. ...
Signed,
A very relieved menopausal wife
Anyway.....I'm in need of real man.....Anyone know any? Where are they hiding?
Now for a more important matter.....I've been a very bad & stupid grrl & now I may have lost my closest friend & it's killing me inside. I hate myself for being so stupid! I'm not going to say what I did, but it was wrong & I'm still beating myself up for it & will continue to do so for a looooong time. I need to start thinking before I open my mouth &/or do things. Eric, I'm soooo fucking sorry & I hope & pray that you will forgive me. I'll do anything (within reason) to make it up to you!!!!MetalEric, Please forgive me & let me make things right & prove to you how much your friendship means to me. Please!
And now for something more cheerful....it's time for a joke....
Dear Tide:
I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used it since the beginning of my married life, when my Mom told me it was the best. Now that I am older and going through menopause, I find it even better!
In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My unfeeling and uncaring husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was and generally started becoming a pain in the neck.
Well one thing led to another and I ended up with a lot of his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn't come out.
After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out!
In fact, the stains came out so well, that when the detectives w ho came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative.
Later, my attorney called and said that I would no longer be considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief.
I thank you, once again, for having such a great product. Well, gotta go now, I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people. ...
Signed,
A very relieved menopausal wife
VIEW 25 of 43 COMMENTS
crazedlunatik:
I like that tide endorsement.... good to know tide is tough on blood...... just in case I ever get married and she starts stocking up on tide I will know what is coming..... 
lightandshade:
if only you liked bigger men...