lavish_

I just want to say I have to apologize to any ladies or members I'v seemed to ignore. Ever since the new site and my set went up I seem to be missing notifications from peoples comments on blogs and such. I just went through a bunch now and have to say thank you for all your support and kind words.

I'm just going through A LOT of horrible shit right now. And it doesn't help that I'm super stressed with work and now planning shoot fests for SG. I've had so many ladies contact me to plan a hangout/shootfest. I just cant do them all I dont have the time or money. Right now I'm planning on doing the following.

Shoot with @zephi and @badviruz next week.
Sleepover with @jenna_ohhhh and possible other ladies next month.

My own personal Florida trip in January.

A possible Chicago trip to @azera in the Spring.

A shootfest with east coast hopefuls the end of April.

Another shootfest with babes in Philly in April/May

AND thats after I narrowed it down. It doesnt seem like much but when you travel as much as I do back and forth to NY and you cant take off all the time from work it is a lot. I'd love to meet and work with all you ladies but its too much for me to handle right now. I am completely broke trying to make my modeling career happen when I'm working a minimum wage job, trying to save to move back to NY, going back to school in January, and trying to cope with a lot of family drama. It is no joke. And I may seem like i have my shit together and I'm fine financially, but I'm not kidding when I say I'm broke. I can't just pay for photographers, hotels, and new tattoos like everyone else. I've been lucky enough to start my modeling career with photographers who just did me favors and didn't ask for money. Same goes for tattoos. A lot of my work I got for trade of old cameras or something I had worth money. I have an apartment with my boyfriend that his parents pay for. I hate being in this position because I'm obsessed with being in control and independent. I'm trying to do all the things I love without any money or support from my family. It's very frustrating and discouraging. I hope you can see why I've been so off lately and not blogging as much or even just a bit cranky. Trying to find a center of peace when there seems to be nothing but chaos tends to be a lot.

With all that being said I'm trying to find the good things in my life to focus on or I won't make it through to next year.

I hope all the wonderful people who have been so kind to me and supportive are having a great day. You deserve it.

xoxoo