I know that you are out there, that flickering fable waiting to shine brightly. I see you in the faces of those I despise, there must be a balance, an antithesis to their apathy.
Perhaps I have only convinced myself that you exist, a false hope for a ficticious character. A memento to give me purpose, forsaking the first step to savor another.
The air races forward and I remember what it is like to lose yourself, even for that fleeting moment. They ask why the threads never change and I can only reply that I refuse to wear anything that I can't leave in the street without a second glance. Another plain white shirt sacrificed to my fear of losing something irreplaceable. So, I stay oddly fitted and beautifully akward, a recipe for stares that I wish to avoid and desperately lust after.
Give me one or the other, solutions or a silencing of the bickering voices eluding eloquence long enough to construct something cohesive.
I have seen your greatness and know that one day you too will realize it. When we stop doubting and actually concieve something vivid.
Perhaps I have only convinced myself that you exist, a false hope for a ficticious character. A memento to give me purpose, forsaking the first step to savor another.
The air races forward and I remember what it is like to lose yourself, even for that fleeting moment. They ask why the threads never change and I can only reply that I refuse to wear anything that I can't leave in the street without a second glance. Another plain white shirt sacrificed to my fear of losing something irreplaceable. So, I stay oddly fitted and beautifully akward, a recipe for stares that I wish to avoid and desperately lust after.
Give me one or the other, solutions or a silencing of the bickering voices eluding eloquence long enough to construct something cohesive.
I have seen your greatness and know that one day you too will realize it. When we stop doubting and actually concieve something vivid.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
by someone that doesn't have to care about me.
yes, i have a nitche.
yes, im self-reliant.
but what use is it, if all these people keep telling you how attractive you are, and at the end of the day, it amounts to nothing but lonliness.
yes, ultimately, we are all alone. the extent to which we recognize this, i find, is directly proportional to our ego.
the more you love yourself, the more you think others love you as well.
its all a farse.
i recognize that baring things like this makes me look highly unstable and co-dependent.
id like to think that im not co-dependent.
its just that everytime i get used to something
it goes away.
its just that everytime i start liking things
it becomes useless.
i want to yell at everything and make it stop being fake.
i bet we can all see through the veneer that is set up by others.
why the want you.
why they talk to you.
why the so desperately want to be your friend.
nobody would want yo u
for no reason
not pertaining gain for themselves.
this act is entertained by varying degrees by all.
some manipulate the extent of their honesty
to make it seem as though they are pure.
the greatest depravity of all, id imagine.
and this is the evil that eats at us.
nothing is wholesome.
not me
not you.
the origin of things always predetermines the eventual fate.
and thus far
i have been very very unlucky.
[Edited on May 10, 2004 1:49AM]