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lastmancandid

sentimental death trap

Member Since 2004

Followers 2 Following 2

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Wednesday Mar 10, 2004

Mar 10, 2004
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So I write to you fucks, who I'm naturally not cool enough to talk to, in this anonymous bullshit internet medium. Which again reaffirms the fact that I am a tool. Maybe I just find it real hard to decipher what I should care about. I know what matters to me and these things have little to zero value to the outside world. Or it could be that my values are shared and I lack the means to present them coherently to others? Regardless I'm a questionable character.

What am I supposed to do? Just walk up and say hello? See here lies the crux of my dilemma. I lack small talk skills. I would much rather skip the intros and pick up that shit in passing. In the course of our conversation about said topic, I will probably pick up your name, interests and what you do with your life in the societal/financial sense. If all you have to tell me is your major and hometown, why the fuck would I talk to you anyway? Don't get me wrong, if we have a conversation and you bring up something you learned in your class, that is quality, if you tell me you are taking that class and I am supposed to be interested, then you are an idiot.

I tell people about the things that matter to me up front and they look at me like I just put my dick in the mash potatoes. Isn't that the point of this social mockery, to find those desirable to you who you feel comfortable telling what you really think? That seems the goal to me, but when I skip the handshake I'm an asshole.

So, am I wrong? Is the small talk essential? Is that how you weed out the undesirables, by eliminating those who lack a facade? I act how I act, why would I change that for you? So I could get to know the fake you that you are showing me, only to find out later that we can't stand each other when the true personality comes out? Sorry, but I have no game. If you don't like me straight off, you probably won't like me ever, but at least I refuse to waste your time. This goes both ways - if I don't like you, I tell you right off so you don't have to keep acting for me.

This presents another problem; I end up liking those people who despise me enough to tell me right away to fuck off. At least they are honest and don't waste time. You may argue that people can "grow on you" and if you never give them the chance you could be missing something. Fair enough, I won't say that some of my best friends weren't once bitter enemies. On the other hand, for every time I've been wrong about a person, ten times I have socked myself for giving some asshole a chance and later discovering they're a dipshit.

So, I want outside opinions from people who I don't know now and will never know anyway. I ask you because I hope you aren't afraid to tell me to get fucked. What can really happen if you offend me here? Nothing. So hit me back.
mistermocha:
Allright! Finally someone who cuts through the bullshit and gets to the point! You're just enough of an honest asshole for me to *bleah* friend you.

Dig it!
Mar 10, 2004
shazzy:
there's nothing sweeter than elizabeth shue circa 1987.
Mar 11, 2004

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