Experiencing excessive frustration today; need a really long walk; finished pynchon's V., no longer have an obsessive distraction; reading the paper and smoking cigarettes is no substitute; coffee doesn't seem to help either; finally did taxes today in preparation for FAFSA, accompanied by fear and self-doubt; last week's adrenaline-rush of school has evaporated, leaving in its wake a sickly-weak feeling, and an inability to concentrate; relationships with flesh-and-blood people including but not limited to the romantic/somatic prove, as usual, complicated and unnerving; obsessed with the diamond bordered by the front hip bones, belly button, and top of pubic bone; sun is bright enough to burn, so I sleep past noon.
i'm sorry i hadn't written back yet, but i planned to... maybe i'll do that now instead of finishing up here....