As you all know, I’ve been on a very long hiatus. I’ve always prided myself on being as candid and open to my followers as I can be, and I’m going to continue to do so. As I’ve mentioned previously, I stopped modeling after falling very ill in 2018, and then after I got sober late that year, I decided to continue the hiatus while I healed. I spent 2019 doing just that, and I cannot even begin to explain how well needed it was and how amazing I am doing right now. I am, quite literally, a completely different person than I was before I got sober, its amazing and terrifying at the same time. I’m no longer ill, and I cannot tell you how much of a miracle that is, because there was a time where I really felt like I was going to be sick forever. I’m well over a year sober, and I’m even back in art school studying graphic design- I got STRAIGHT As my first semester back, and holy shit guys, I have never gotten straight As in my entire life lmao
I want to start modeling again, but honestly, the idea of it intimidates me. The idea of making this post alone intimidated me up until now. It’s been so long, and sometimes I second guess myself a lot about it. Before my hiatus, all I wanted was to go pink. It was basically my biggest career dream. I wanted it so badly that I became a hyper-perfectionist, and ended up hating all the sets I put out because I convinced myself they weren’t good enough. I was constantly comparing myself to other models, and consequently got involved in drama and lashed out for no good reason at all. And for a little while after my hiatus, I thought I would never return to SG because going pink was never going to happen anyway, so why even bother? But, as my head cleared, I realized something; the thing that I loved most about SG is the community, the members, the models, just all of it. I loved being apart of this online community and sharing my pictures and my works with all of you. So who cares if I never make the front page? I love making sets for SG, I love sharing them with all of you, so I will continue to do it and I will wear a smile the entire time, pink or not.
I’m not making a comeback set just yet. I’m not doing a lot of shoots at the moment because being in a visual arts conservatory of a super competitive arts school means having a ridiculous amount of homework. Right now, school is my full time job. The sets I am doing are mostly for a local NY modeling group called DSPNY (poormodels on instagram, give em a follow), and they are mostly selfie sets, because that’s what I can fit in my schedule. BUT, even though I cannot yet give you all a timeframe as to when I am officially making new sets, I can promise that I will try to be more active on here, and as soon as summer break starts, I will be making content again.
Thank you all for your continued support through all my ups and downs and life crises. I seriously cannot even begin to explain how much I appreciate all of you, and I can’t wait for you to see what I end up doing next ❤️❤️❤️❤️
