I have a bit of a problem. You see I have this friend and I think she may be in some personal trouble. I've noticed lately she has a lot of bruises and cuts,all over her body. I think her boyfriend may be abuseing her. I mean yesterday she couldn't even hardly walk. It's been going on for awhile but it seems like it's getting worse. First it was just a bruise here or there,like she just bumped into something. Now there everywhere and most recently cuts have been showing up on her body. She try's to hide them but I always see them.Today at the gym we were changeing and she had a huge bruise on her back that she said she got when she fell out of the computer chair. It was absolutely a lie. Her boyfriend is one of those my girlfriend is my property guys. None of her friends like him cause to us we see a fucking asshole, She see's this sweet loveing guy,which is far from true. I'mgetting more and more concerned for her. I am afraid she's going to end up in the hospital or worse. I love her to death and really care about her and she's always takeing offense when I ask if he did this to her. I'm stuck I don't know what to do. Any suggestions?
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As a side note, any man who hits his woman is no longer a man, but merely an animal fit to be beaten.
The unfortunate thing is this situation is 50% your friend. The boyfriend isn't the entire problem. There is an issue of low self-esteem, self-hate in her that will even drive her to defend her boyfriend against the people who genuinely care about her. You know her best, she never had the best opinion of herself right? It hasn't been the easiest thing in the world for her to get a boy right? Even if it sucks it's better than nothing...that's the attitude right?
Dealing with the boyfriend is easy. A bully will respond to a bigger bully.
it's your friend who has a lot of personal work ahead of her. you could successfully get her away from this loser, but if SHE hasn't changed, she's just going to find herself another asshole and the whole cycle starts again. I say get her to hang out AWAY from her boyfriend as much as possible, get her happy AWAY from her boyfriend, build up her strength and self-confidence.
[Edited on Jun 14, 2003]