l1vingdeadgurl

I have never felt this much pain before. All I can say is this time the fuck up was real, it was huge and unforgivable. And I can't forgive myself. I dont want to be here anymore.

all i wanted is gone with your stare, all i wanted is gone with your stare
so tell me when you hear my heart stop , your the only one that knows
So tell me when my crying's over, you're the reason that I'm crying.
Tell me when you hear me falling, there's a possibility it wouldn't show.
Don't worry about me, I follow where...
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Oh Make me over
I'm all I want to be
A walking study
in demonology



I am actually a little busy at work today which is good I guess. I had to step out and see the Psychiatrist for my twice monthly appointment. After waiting for her to finish her lunch, I got in to see her. There were these ladies in the waiting room...
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New job is boring so far. I am a bag of worry. Lots of changes going on in my life right now. Time to be a grown up LOL.

So no more crazy hair, no more large visible tattoos and no more piercings. This is the real world, its time I carved a place in it.

So New Moon comes out Friday. I cannot wait....
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" we have too many sounding words and too few actions that corrospond with them"

I am turning a new page in my life tomorrow. I am filled with fear, dread for the unknown and excitement all at once. Turning pages has proven very difficult in my life. I hang on to things too strongly, too deeply. My mental connections with people become complicated, on...
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Ok so I did something very terrible to someone I care about a ton. He is now ignoring me and has blocked me. So I don't know how else to let him know how sorry I am. I know he reads this and I am hoping he realizes how much I do care, no matter what I said in the heat of the angry moment....
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Come up to meet you,
Tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, Tell you I need you
Tell you I've set you apart
Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions
Oh lets go back to the start


Manic cycling this weekend... this pretty much sums up my weekend...



LOL.
Followed by a hangover and...
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Heaven bent to take my hand
And lead me through the fire
Be the long awaited answer
To a long and painful fight
Truth be told I've tried my best
But somewhere along the way
I got caught up in all there was to offer
And the cost was so much more than I could bear
Though I've tried, I've fallen...
I have sunk so...
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OMG this is hilarious....




Since I am forced to be off work today, and I don't really think I have the flu, I will probably clean and do laundry. Exciting right?

Nothing exciting has happened here in Ontario. Except a 13 year old died from the piggy flu. My son is 11. A little close for comfort. But he is managing to drive me absolutely...
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