Apparently I am having a manic episode yet I am not sure why. So I have gathered my creativity back for maybe a day or so until it passes or the medications start working again. Its nice being this way. I am not a crazy manic. I just am overly happy and energetic, which compared to my lethargic, emotionless former self is a nice switch.
Mondays around these parts are reserved for the idiots and simpletons of society. I spend most of my Monday morning responding to the millions of emails I get over the weekend because apparently I should be working 7 days a week. 9 out of 10 emails I get are a horribly stupid question that if the person who sent it had possible read the advertisement over and possibly used what little common sense they had, would more than likely arrive to a satisfactory answer. Its elementary my dear Watson!
In honor of Manic Monday (insert lame joke here), or idiotic Monday I have decided to compile a list of questions that I ponder and have me stumped. Maybe its possible you will have the answer and if so I welcome your response with open arms.
After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?
Are there any unguided missiles?
Are you breaking the law if you drive past those road signs that say "Do Not Pass"?
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
Day light savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it?
Do clowns wear really big socks?
Do fish get thirsty?
Do people in Australia call the rest of the world 'up over'?
Does a man-eating shark eat women, too?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
How do they get the "Keep off the Grass" sign on the grass?
How do you get off a nonstop flight?
How do you know if honesty is the best policy unless you've tried some of the others?
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green, and a lemon called a yellow?
If cats and dog didn't have fur would we still pet them?
If humans get a charley horse, what do horses get?
If man evolved from apes why do we still have apes?
If our knees were on the backs of our legs, what would chairs look like?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Was the pole vault accidentally discovered by a clumsy javelin thrower?
What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
What do you call a male ladybug?
What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty is an egg?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Why aren't there ever any guilty bystanders?
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
I welcome your thoughts
Mondays around these parts are reserved for the idiots and simpletons of society. I spend most of my Monday morning responding to the millions of emails I get over the weekend because apparently I should be working 7 days a week. 9 out of 10 emails I get are a horribly stupid question that if the person who sent it had possible read the advertisement over and possibly used what little common sense they had, would more than likely arrive to a satisfactory answer. Its elementary my dear Watson!
In honor of Manic Monday (insert lame joke here), or idiotic Monday I have decided to compile a list of questions that I ponder and have me stumped. Maybe its possible you will have the answer and if so I welcome your response with open arms.
After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?
Are there any unguided missiles?
Are you breaking the law if you drive past those road signs that say "Do Not Pass"?
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
Can a stupid person be a smart-ass?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
Day light savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it?
Do clowns wear really big socks?
Do fish get thirsty?
Do people in Australia call the rest of the world 'up over'?
Does a man-eating shark eat women, too?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
How do they get the "Keep off the Grass" sign on the grass?
How do you get off a nonstop flight?
How do you know if honesty is the best policy unless you've tried some of the others?
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green, and a lemon called a yellow?
If cats and dog didn't have fur would we still pet them?
If humans get a charley horse, what do horses get?
If man evolved from apes why do we still have apes?
If our knees were on the backs of our legs, what would chairs look like?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Was the pole vault accidentally discovered by a clumsy javelin thrower?
What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
What do you call a male ladybug?
What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty is an egg?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Why aren't there ever any guilty bystanders?
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
I welcome your thoughts
Thanks, you cheered me up!!
You are, of course, totally right.
People are stupid.