l1vingdeadgurl

so sick, can't shake these flu like symptoms, mostly at night. I am not eating, not sleeping and having chest pain every day all day. I get the chills then the hot flashes.

GAH.

I can't say I even know what to say anymore. Its like the days come in and out like a dream and no cognitive thoughts even pass through my brain.

I think dogs truly are man's best friend. I got a puppy last weekend to help me forget about all the heartache I am going through. I mean puppies love you unconditionally right? They don't...
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Going to my daughter's first away ringette game. I am so excited because she is an amazing player and its like watching everything you hoped for come true.

Pictures will follow,
We will be in Thornhill at Milliken Mills arena if anyone is close and wants to drop by.

xoxoxo
Alaska

most people could tell i am depressed because i have spent the last hour and half writing. they'd be close to being right.

the making's of a fucking shit day

6:10 am - wake up with a massive sinus headache, after not sleeping at all, next to someone who needs to shower and shave in a room with the feeling of a sauna with stank....
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I guess I should post something here to avoid the wrath of being kicked out of SG land. I've been so damn busy and will be sure to post something funny and witty soon.

Get to see my love soon and I am super excited.

kisses Mitch!

Long time no blog.

Life or something like it got in the way.....but I am feeling so amazingly beautiful and awesome and smitten with someone special. Its a new feeling from the typical passive-aggressive love I normally find. He is beautiful inside and out.


For him, I send this....

Trails
In cities you never visited I sensed your presence
In bungalow colonies and airport delicatessens...
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at the risk of sounding all whiny and shit here goes

I am so fucking beyond done with people, men in particular. I clearly have alot less self esteem than I initially thought because I continually let the same guys take advantage of me over and over again and take it with a smile on my face.

I am getting a divorce
I am leaving...
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The last month in review:

It's pretty pathetic I can find time to write a 5 minute blog.

I've been getting progressively worse Health wise. Regular blood test and aal that crap.
Promotion at work which came with more work and the same pay :p
Big decisions, should I stay or should I go? More drama at home, more feeling like a piece of shit...
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Wow the last time I wrote I dont remember.
Funny how a small change in your life has such a big impact.
So a summary of the time in between....

Promotion at work, own office, big responsibility, more communication with the hospitals and the patients. Its good I love it. I found my calling, it took a while but I guess I always believed it...
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