l1vingdeadgurl

I ran away today, ran from the noise, ran away
Don't wanna go back to that place, but don't have
no choice, no way
It ain't easy growin up in World War III
Never knowin what love could be, well I've seen
I don't want love to destroy me like it did my
family



There comes a time in life where big decisions have to...
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Things are somewhat better today. I didn't O'D on ativan as I was sure I was going to. My nerves were just so bad yesterday...
I have come up with a game plan, which number one involves a new job and number two following through on two of my passions, photography and jewellery. I have a contact in Alberta for the jewelley and I am...
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I think I am high.... My behaviour of the last few months has been inexcusable and I have finally be called out on it. So I took what was left of my Ativan and just hoped it would go away. That this really wouldn't be happening- that I was 19 again and could start all over. My chest hurts from holding in the tears. I...
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Today begins 8 blissful days off. I am so stoked. Plus my mom will be here which is exciting for me cause I have really missed her. I finally saw District 9 it was awesome. I probably already mentioned that in another blog. My mind is very scattered lately.

So there is a new girl at my work and I really like her. We share...
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If I have to waych one more fucking hockey game I am going to stick needles in my eyeballs. I mean how much fucking hockey can one person watch? It's like I get home from work and it's ON!!!!! All the fucking time.
Oh hell yes I am going to complain. I also fell off a fucking ladder at work, hurt my ankle, hit my...
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I am sick of people. Sick of all the jerks and assholes out there who feel its ok to treat someone like dirt. Self centered narcissistic bastards who are only out to gain for themselves. Those same assholes who think its ok to hurt peoples feelings because its only feelings right?

ARRGGGGHHHH!!

I am seriously considering erasing my msn, facebook and changing my cell phone....
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I had a really really crappy day. It all centered over a comment that was made about me by a total asshole stranger. It hurt though because I think deep down I know its true. It made perfect sense yet no sense at all. The reason guys use me, lead me on and basically just act like total dicks is because they can. Because I...
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I absolutely DO NOT want to go to work today. They have been driving us so hard we are all exhausted and can barely gather the energy to get up in the morning. So I have decided to compile a list of excuses to NOT go to work. Feel free to use any of them as your own..

I won't be in today. My fish...
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I was think today that not many people (including my spouse) know the little things about me. The seemingly insignifigant things that will mean something 40 years from now. So I decided to do a blog all about me. I will only do it once so you better remember

My Favorite

Flower- White Orchids
Color- Fuschia Pink (black comes a close second)
Regular movie- Eternal...
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Ok Epic Blog Time...

Me:
This will make perfect sense and no sense at all. I am a whirlwind of emotions, my life is in utter chaos and I sometimes I quite enjoy it. I enjoy the feelings of anger towards others, the feelings of wanting to hurt someone as I have been hurt, make them feel my pain. I enjoy hurting myself, I enjoy...
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