Hey there everyone, hope you are all doing well and hanging in there. Welcome to another edition of my In General. Just myself & I just chatting away and talking to you dear readers.
So yeah most of yous saw my mini blog & my post/story of the late @sophii the other day. Thank you btw, I thought it was nice to do and I was nervous doing it. Then again I am always nervous. Especially with online cause you never know if things are genuine or not you know. But I know the majority of you here on SG, it is. But thank you to all that left their feedback so far like @sophiestonem @evevalentine @svetlanna @sirena @elixic @brea @mataro and @akiramai on the mini blog. In my IG post I want to thank @minuminula @acsebo @seasick @julha @reznoritis @annanymph @ashena @paigerose @luie @nordie @annaedelrid @marysa @romany @elaena and so forth. Thank you all, it is sad and I can't thank yous enough for the feedback on my tribute to her.
Tbh with yous guys along with that news. This week alone has been truly awful. Even though I had a good walk with my Dad. I feel down and drained you know. Been like that for a while but idk the lockdown here in Scotland & being alone all the time has been beating up my mental health a lot. And the only time I feel any sort of happiness is writing blogs, chatting to yous and sleeping a lot atm. What I mean by chatting, I mean DMing. Since I don't do video chats, I don't have zroom, my personal mates don't really talk to me and I'm more easily upset these days you know. I know I don't have a GF but these days, damn it I wish I do. Just to hug. I know it sounds zany but it's true. Probably ppl thinking "Oh you just want a GF for sex" no not really. I just someone to hug and talk to face to face you know. That's how down I can get. That's why I may reply later than sooner or barely start a convo at all. I know for yous ladies it is the same too since most ppl online are creepos. Not all but most of them. That's why I don't blame ladies not chatting back. Since their protecting themselves and all that. TBH that's what I want from any Alt Models out there or sex worker....whatever. Just keep safe and careful online. But I know here is a safe zone. I'm a safe zone. I'm not saying this for attention or to beg to yous to start talking to me. Cause I don't like ppl doing something against there will.
In fact it's a big hate of mine and I see it on the social medias all the time. It does get me a bit mad at it. You see these ppl go "follow to follow" "Don't @ me" "Please fund me" etc. Look I understand. Times are tough and you want to build a following and all of that. But personally people, I can't stand it. It's basically attention seeking to me and just begging for things to be handled to you on a silver platter. I always hate that attitude with social media & youtube people. Like I own them a like, sub, comment, etc. You know it's so forceful and I bloody hate that about the internet. I never go like that. The reason you 418 followers of mine follow me is your choice. Up to you. No pressure here. I let ppl decide to follow me or not. Your choice peeps. I love my followers since they follow me for who I am. Like on my Instagram. Whatever their opinion is of me, it's why they follow me. Hell I started expecting barely any followers in this site but I've done alright. That's cause yous want to. I know I tag people in my blog a lot but it's to let them know their in my blog and whatever they want to do is up to them. That's how I do it. No sponsors, no begging for likes, no begging for front page, no begging for follows, etc. Just writing blogs and supporting alt models & the photographers. I have made friends with most of the models, photographers, staff & members of this site cause they want to. I mean take this for example. @rubyalexia follows me, not cause I beg her to. It's cause she wants to since we are long time online mates. Same with @evoke cause we have deep convos and hear each other out. Hell since I said I quit OnlyFans. You know how much backlash I got? Zero. Everyone understand that the bank I'm with is being a dick with the payment blocking. And they understand. Just like many understand why I have criticism about social media cause a lot of them will agree with me. But that's cause they want to.
My stuff is pressure free. No forceful bullshit. Just straight up positive vibes and honesty. I know I'm not perfect but nobody is. We all have our flaws but also that's what also makes us special. I mean I have ASD & mental issues but it made me the guy that I am today. And a lot of yous appreciate me and support me back. All cause yous want to and I can't thank yous enough. Hell I got this SG membership for free cause of @chroi cause she wanted to. I didn't ask anyone to give me anything at all. Yous want to. I do what I do cause I do generally enjoy supporting my favourite Alt Models and the photographers in my blog series and on my Instagram fan account. Since I have a lot of free time, why not do it since I'm lockdown by our corrupt UK Government and has been for decades. Hell that's why I am mostly indoors cause of ppl still don't understand ASD and theirs not enough awareness for people with Aspergers, Autistic Spectrum Disorder and Chronic Illness. Cause of a Tory MP called Ian Duncan Smith. Who has been anti disable people/anti mental health and has been in charge of the mental health stuff in the UK for years. No joke, look him up. That's why I've been bouncing from support places to support places for years with bad results after being extremely bullied in College. So it's been a rough ride for me and yeah I get easily down. But with that past, do you blame me? Now I'm not saying this for attention here, just cause that is my life. I do my best but if people get so overly serious, defensive and get all melodramatic. I get fed up and move on.
Unfortunately that's what happened in the Discord community I was apart of. I'm not mentioning names since if I do, it backfires. Look at this time last year Check This Blog why I don't mention names, lesson learned. Also the Discord is runned by a good friend of mine and don't want this to be taking the wrong way. So I had a falling out on it and it was escalating to become that point for a month or so. Basically this guy I was mates of was being all super serious and defensive towards me. I was in the movie chat and all of us were having a banter, a laugh as you do. And my jokes are light hearted & meant to cheer someone up. Somehow my mate took it the wrong way and accused me of saying oh I meant it and you think I'm a prick. You know stuff like that and I'm like "what no I was kidding" since he was reading me the wrong way and I told him that but he was twisting my words saying "no your taking me the wrong way" you know and I'm like, mate I was just having a joke. Calm down. I do hear he is having issues in his personal life. So do I as I mentioned it above. But I don't go off people like that. So trying to be the better man, I said sorry and didn't mean to offend him you know. Cause it wasn't. And I thought ok it's sorted, good let's move on. So a few days later. I was having a banter with the other ppl in the Discord community and he came in. I did a joke again, again it's harmless. That's just me. I usually joke about and have a laugh like normal people do you know. My jokes are friendly, anyone of my many SG Mates will tell you. Hell check my bio. One of the things I can't live without is my sense of humour. I am Scottish after all and we all love to have a laugh up here. As well as it is with yous. So again he went in my DMs and starts being overly sensitive to me like a social justice warrior. I keep trying to go, sorry didn't mean to offend you once again and basically repeating myself. Just even talking to this guy was getting me upset & down in the dumps. So I said to him I'm done with you. I'm out of that Discord community since he was a mod there and I said to my friend that I left. But that friend assisted I stay cause that friend is so nice & kind. But I said to that friend, no let him be the mod and I'll leave cause I got other things to do. Like writing blogs on here and creating post for my Instagram fan account. But my friend is playing peacemaker and said you should sorted it out. But I told my friend I did and tried a few times but he keeps trying to paint me in a bad light & demand from me you know. So I said that's it I'm done with it.
Seriously it was stressing me out so much that. I'm glad it's over, thank fuck tbh with yous. Honestly it was rough that. So I'm still feeling down in the dumps from it. That's why I was saying what I am saying in this blog since it got to the point where I wish I had a GF, just to hug and I am no begger you know. It was not fun. Glad it's over and he's blocked. So over it.
So that's why I left Twitter too and thinking of leaving Twitch too since I want to focus on my blogs more since I really prefer being the behind the scenes guy. Also cause I'm such a shy introvert person lol. Yeah also it is really cause I want to hang out here in this site often. I hate not being on here often and I want to just hang out, chat in the groups and comment/like the post/sets here like I did before. I love the DM convos I had with people here. Yous guys do save me from my own mental health issues. Honestly, I can't thank yous enough.
Yeah it is been tough but at least I got here and my Instagram fan accounts. Seriously it has helped me out as well as the people I have supported.
So expect a lot of blogs from me. Including bringing back my FSS blog series. Yes it is coming back, no more FSS Special blogs. But I also be doing a blog on my Alt Model calendar collection of 2021 as well. Also I'll doing this blog series, Hopeful Highlight, Appreciation, Q&As if I get nominated and I'll be doing Blog Homework regularly too.
Yeah I do miss being active so I do promise I will be and thank you everyone that has read this blog and my other blogs. It does mean a lot.
I'm happy that a lot of yous choose to follow me, chat to me, support me, be friends with me, etc. My DM is always open. No pressure. Remember up to yourself.
I do get the comments, I don't why I haven't followed you from models here. I remember @nayru saying it to me and I'm like it's ok really. I know it is hard to keep track when your busy. Believe me I've been there and there's never any pressure with me. Like I said it is up to yous. I'm like @phianixx no pressure up to yourself, only I'm a man and I don't have a cat named Paul lol. But yeah there's no pressure with me. But I know a lot of yous know that.
So yeah that's my In General blog done for the next one. Thank you for reading and allow me to get things off my chest & hearing me out. Yous are the best.
So til the next blog, this is Kevin saying thank you for reading, take care.
@missy @sean @penny @eirenne @lust @lemon @yessybear @mickey