2019 was tough, so tough in many aspects. I achieved a lot and I changed to better a lot but I also went through a lot of loss and a lot of grief and a lot of pain. I can hardly wait when it is over.
I believe that 2020 will be a karmic year tho. And I got plans for that special year. I am going to work a lot and to work hard. I love working in adult industry and I want to gain success. I need money badly after all. I want to pay all my fucking loans in 2020. I also want to make a surgery on my breasts, to get implants. This is expensive, so I need to work as hard as possible.
I need to learn self-discipline and that is what I am going to to in 2020. Mostly it is lack of self discipline which prevents me from bringing my plans to life. I procrastinate a lot and then feel unhappy. I am going to do something with that, I am sick and tired of it.
I want to try going to the gym. I never did sports in my life but for some drunk snowboarding but I know that sport and trainings are extremely motivating. And I need to work on my bum too.
I am going to shoot as much as possible! Modelling is making me happy. And of course I am going to shoot sets for Suicidegirls! I am so happy that I became a part of this amazing community (one of the best parts of 2019) and met so many truly wonderful people! You all, guys and girls are a very special part of my life. You make me inspired and happy every single day. You make me smile and overwhelm with joy and delight. Models and members - you are all epic people and I am hugging you all and looking forward to another fantastic year together.
Now that my marriage is most likely over I am thinking also of leaving my place. There is nothing to do in my provincial town really. Besides I want to travel. To see new places. I have already some vague ideas where I am going to. If everything turns as I plan I would probably leave Russia which has always been my dream.
And the last - but not the least - I just want to find peace with my own heart.
@rambo @missy @eirenne @sean @mickey
