Hope Halloween was good for everyone!
It wasn't very good for me. I mean, I did get to hang with my friends, that part was good, but I was (& still am) depressed with the lovely irritation & lothing & misery & insomnia (even on sleeping meds) & all the typical depression BS... & I am probably having a sort of nervous breakdown too, even as I write this.... who knows.
Maybe it is this time of year or something. For the last 14 years every single November/December (especially December) has been overwhelming & filled with crying fits, hysteria, depression & other kinds of emotional crazies & crisises. It is the worst time of year for me & I truely dread it from January til it happens. I try every year to make it work & it always ends in an ugly mess with me at the bottom in the fetal position. I bought myself a fiberoptic tree (which I have always wanted) this year, I am trying to take it easy & spoil myself alittle bit. I am trying to go through this season in a calm & mellow way so I can actually enjoy it. I am trying to make it a happy time. I try this every year. It hasn't worked yet. But, I really hope this year can be a good one for me.
It wasn't very good for me. I mean, I did get to hang with my friends, that part was good, but I was (& still am) depressed with the lovely irritation & lothing & misery & insomnia (even on sleeping meds) & all the typical depression BS... & I am probably having a sort of nervous breakdown too, even as I write this.... who knows.
Maybe it is this time of year or something. For the last 14 years every single November/December (especially December) has been overwhelming & filled with crying fits, hysteria, depression & other kinds of emotional crazies & crisises. It is the worst time of year for me & I truely dread it from January til it happens. I try every year to make it work & it always ends in an ugly mess with me at the bottom in the fetal position. I bought myself a fiberoptic tree (which I have always wanted) this year, I am trying to take it easy & spoil myself alittle bit. I am trying to go through this season in a calm & mellow way so I can actually enjoy it. I am trying to make it a happy time. I try this every year. It hasn't worked yet. But, I really hope this year can be a good one for me.
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Here's to a better Christmas for both of us. I spent last year's holiday in the ICU so hell, anything's gotta be better than that!