KICKING THE BORDER AND KICKED ACROSS THE BORDER
Back in Hong Kong and presently sneezing up a lung as I adjust to the new weather.
Almost didn't make it. In some alternate dimension, I am currently sneezing in a Chinese jail just a few miles away across the border. I hit the border with the infinite optimism one gets from a fresh good-bye kiss from a girlfriend, only to find that my Visa was all fucked up and that the Visa I applied for (one month stay) unbeknownst to me was actually processed as only for FIVE FUCKING DAYS. Meaning that I overstayed my visit, oh, about 14 days. The Chinese government charges illegal stays $60 a day, so I was quite a bit in the red.
The immigration officials escorted me off the line, explained to my problem, but also explained they were completely ignorant of how Visas work, and that one alternative of returning to China to extend the visa may only increase my fine by staying extra days.
This is exactly the sort of thing I hate (see "Makes me Sad" list): idiotic big-muscled bureaucracy. Really fucking scary situation, when freedom is just a foot over an abstract line, and two men with guns stand in front of you. You're not allowed forward, and you're not allowed backward either, and these two men are holding the only card you got left: your passport.
I got so mad I kicked the metal fence that is the border, at which point the immigration officers immediately freaked out and started yelling loudly, and I suddenly knew I was about half an inch from really being in deep shit.
I suddenly remembered a similar time three years ago when I was falsely picked up for "spying" in Canton, and realized, oh fuck that might be on my record.
My Hong Kong cell is blocked on the Chinese side of the border, my Beijing cell was running low on money, and my parents told me that my bank card had just expired.
Luckily I got a friend on the horn and he talked me through it, while the guys managing the public phone were amused at my histronics. The ATM fairy conjured up some money and here I am alone and lonely in my HK apartment, girlfriend-less, slightly in debt, but at least not in jail.
Back in Hong Kong and presently sneezing up a lung as I adjust to the new weather.
Almost didn't make it. In some alternate dimension, I am currently sneezing in a Chinese jail just a few miles away across the border. I hit the border with the infinite optimism one gets from a fresh good-bye kiss from a girlfriend, only to find that my Visa was all fucked up and that the Visa I applied for (one month stay) unbeknownst to me was actually processed as only for FIVE FUCKING DAYS. Meaning that I overstayed my visit, oh, about 14 days. The Chinese government charges illegal stays $60 a day, so I was quite a bit in the red.
The immigration officials escorted me off the line, explained to my problem, but also explained they were completely ignorant of how Visas work, and that one alternative of returning to China to extend the visa may only increase my fine by staying extra days.
This is exactly the sort of thing I hate (see "Makes me Sad" list): idiotic big-muscled bureaucracy. Really fucking scary situation, when freedom is just a foot over an abstract line, and two men with guns stand in front of you. You're not allowed forward, and you're not allowed backward either, and these two men are holding the only card you got left: your passport.
I got so mad I kicked the metal fence that is the border, at which point the immigration officers immediately freaked out and started yelling loudly, and I suddenly knew I was about half an inch from really being in deep shit.
I suddenly remembered a similar time three years ago when I was falsely picked up for "spying" in Canton, and realized, oh fuck that might be on my record.
My Hong Kong cell is blocked on the Chinese side of the border, my Beijing cell was running low on money, and my parents told me that my bank card had just expired.
Luckily I got a friend on the horn and he talked me through it, while the guys managing the public phone were amused at my histronics. The ATM fairy conjured up some money and here I am alone and lonely in my HK apartment, girlfriend-less, slightly in debt, but at least not in jail.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
yes, lady sovereign was tiny and totally not my thing. at the end of her performance, she threw the mic on the stage, which hurt my baby ears. i will never forgive her for that.
lately i have been listening to a band called the living things. if you steal music, which we all do, look for a track called "bom bom bom". it's just a bit irresistable.
me + sufjan stevens = this friday!