It takes a really long time to get over something. Like those damn buttons. I know they'll be gone soon but damn, that was not a well thought out plan.
I'm just glad I don't use this site to actually talk about my feelings and personal life anymore, everything in the past, well, it can stay there. And, you know, I AM making this journal public and maybe it will be the last one I post.
Consider the following: someone I know, coming to the site on their own (either by way of researchiing on Google, reading an article in a magazine or seeing the HBO special) then discovering that I am member is much less threatening and more manageable than a family member, coming from Facebook, and having no background as to what SuicideGirls.com is.
Some people say "Who gives a fuck what people think? Just be who you want to be." and that's a great way to live. Doesn't work for everyone. It's not what everyone wants. People are different, isn't diversity one of the great things about humans and life in general? If you really think it through, you'll realize tough love doesn't work the same way for everyone.
I first joined SG I was 20. I was just out of high school and attending a local community college with whatever intentions for further schooling my parents had for me. I couldn't think for myself because I never had the chance to, so I just didn't know how. I didn't know anyone that I hadn't been going to school with for years. I didn't have the chance to be part of a community of people that actually thought like me. All my friends were friends from childhood and yes, I did, and do, love them dearly but I never thought anyone really understood me. I spent a lot of my childhood feeling alone.
Through SuicideGirls I was able to meet people who were different from everyone I had known previously. People from different walks of life with different passions and hobbies. Older people who had experiences that I had never even thought about. I spent so many waking hours on this site because there was so much to explore and so much to learn from people.
I used to come here and post journal entries every day. These were things that I wouldn't tell to people in my life because sometimes it's just easier to talk to strangers about it. Strangers who don't judge you on your previous actions. Maybe you just want to vent without being judged and without having to apologize later for saying things you were thinking in the moment but aren't really helpful in coming to a resolution or later have to be embarrassed about saying. Maybe you want somewhere where you can talk, no holds barred.
I grew a lot from my years of being a member of this site. Mostly from all the people I met but also from the freedom of being able to say what I wanted to say without alienating the people in my life who knew me off the site. I didn't know how to make the transition, I didn't even know there was one to make though I can see it now. Anyway, I'm glad I had the opportunity to to grow in an environment where I didn't have to feel like I was different and that being different was bad.I've changed a lot from who I used to be. Maybe my family doesn't understand it but I no longer feel I need to explain because I know other people who understand without explanation.
So when those buttons that link journal entries and profiles to Twitter and Facebook appeared, it really scared me and made me angry. Thinking about myself now, I'm really okay with it because I'm prepared, but no one should be forced against their will to do something before they are ready. It seems like a teeny tiny, insignificant thing, but it would have been a huge "thing" for me if my family and friends learned about my profile on this site 7 years ago.
Afterthought: I understand the need and desire to keep up with trends but an option to toggle those buttons on/off for each user in personal preferences would be much appreciated. Meaning "Yes, other members can tweet or like my posts" or "No, I would prefer if other members did not share my journals/comments/pictures."
I'm just glad I don't use this site to actually talk about my feelings and personal life anymore, everything in the past, well, it can stay there. And, you know, I AM making this journal public and maybe it will be the last one I post.
Consider the following: someone I know, coming to the site on their own (either by way of researchiing on Google, reading an article in a magazine or seeing the HBO special) then discovering that I am member is much less threatening and more manageable than a family member, coming from Facebook, and having no background as to what SuicideGirls.com is.
Some people say "Who gives a fuck what people think? Just be who you want to be." and that's a great way to live. Doesn't work for everyone. It's not what everyone wants. People are different, isn't diversity one of the great things about humans and life in general? If you really think it through, you'll realize tough love doesn't work the same way for everyone.
I first joined SG I was 20. I was just out of high school and attending a local community college with whatever intentions for further schooling my parents had for me. I couldn't think for myself because I never had the chance to, so I just didn't know how. I didn't know anyone that I hadn't been going to school with for years. I didn't have the chance to be part of a community of people that actually thought like me. All my friends were friends from childhood and yes, I did, and do, love them dearly but I never thought anyone really understood me. I spent a lot of my childhood feeling alone.
Through SuicideGirls I was able to meet people who were different from everyone I had known previously. People from different walks of life with different passions and hobbies. Older people who had experiences that I had never even thought about. I spent so many waking hours on this site because there was so much to explore and so much to learn from people.
I used to come here and post journal entries every day. These were things that I wouldn't tell to people in my life because sometimes it's just easier to talk to strangers about it. Strangers who don't judge you on your previous actions. Maybe you just want to vent without being judged and without having to apologize later for saying things you were thinking in the moment but aren't really helpful in coming to a resolution or later have to be embarrassed about saying. Maybe you want somewhere where you can talk, no holds barred.
I grew a lot from my years of being a member of this site. Mostly from all the people I met but also from the freedom of being able to say what I wanted to say without alienating the people in my life who knew me off the site. I didn't know how to make the transition, I didn't even know there was one to make though I can see it now. Anyway, I'm glad I had the opportunity to to grow in an environment where I didn't have to feel like I was different and that being different was bad.I've changed a lot from who I used to be. Maybe my family doesn't understand it but I no longer feel I need to explain because I know other people who understand without explanation.
So when those buttons that link journal entries and profiles to Twitter and Facebook appeared, it really scared me and made me angry. Thinking about myself now, I'm really okay with it because I'm prepared, but no one should be forced against their will to do something before they are ready. It seems like a teeny tiny, insignificant thing, but it would have been a huge "thing" for me if my family and friends learned about my profile on this site 7 years ago.
Afterthought: I understand the need and desire to keep up with trends but an option to toggle those buttons on/off for each user in personal preferences would be much appreciated. Meaning "Yes, other members can tweet or like my posts" or "No, I would prefer if other members did not share my journals/comments/pictures."
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
Very well spoken and I feel the same way on a few of the key points that you brought up. I joined SG in 2002 because I have never felt like I belonged to anything, anywhere, and I was looking for a community of outcasts, or just plain freaks. This site has got more mainstream over the years (which is ok with me), and I still enjoy it for various reasons such as the groups, community, and blogs from members that I like. It doesn't hurt that there are beautiful naked girls on the site. The longer I am here though, the less that really matters to me, and the people have become the best aspect. Tuffy comes to mind, he cracks me up a lot with his dry sense of humor. You are also someone that I enjoy reading too, thanks for being here.
...you know i've been around for a good while... don't like or understand the buttons..
how ya been?