kokeshi

I spent the last 20 minutes with my still fingers on the keyboard, staring at this blank box and trying to write something that barely make sense but it's clear that I'm miserably failing at it.

August has been a month full of negative emotions, bad thoughts, food deprivation and lots of crying. As sad as it can sound, I actually needed some of that right now. My concious side, or at least what's left of it, after a few weeks of teenage whining slapped and yelled at me to shut the fuck up and stop with all the blubbing.

Self satisfaction, first of all.

So now I'm fighting the urge to kill everyone that sorrounds me sewing locked up in my room 24/7. It's all about scissors, threads, fabrics, cardboards, cigarettes, coffee, cookies, movies and MUSIC.
I kept the food deprivation and added insomnia (3 days straight, I felt like I was fucking dying) to the list but all the sad feelings, even if still there, are pressed at the bottom of my soul 'cause there's no time to deal with that shit right now.

Done with the bubbling I leave you with what you really want: bad webcam pictures.



Life.


First 48 hours with no sleep, no food but lots of sewing projects closed.


Almost all that I need right now in my life.


Obsession.

And when at 8 pm you take a break to smoke a cigarette and you have this before your eyes, you can just lean back and smile.