kogun

Was just emailed this, found it to be funny especially the last thing so decided I'd share

THE PERFECT DAY -

6:00 Alarm

6:15 Blow job

6:30 Massive satisfying dump while reading the sports section

7:00 Breakfast - rump steak and eggs, coffee and toast, all cooked by naked buxom wench

7:30 Limo arrives

7:45 Several Whiskeys en-route to airport

9:15 Flight in personal Lear Jet

9:30 Limo to Riverside Oaks Golf Club [Blow job en-route]

9:45 Play front nine [2 under]

11:45 Lunch - Pie, chips and gravy, 3 lagers and a bottle of Dom Perignon

12:15 Blow job

12:30 Play back nine [4 under]

14:15 Limo back to airport

14:30 Fly to Monte Carlo

15:30 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female crew [all nude]

16:30 Land world record Marlin [1234lbs] on light tackle

17:00 Fly home - massage and hand job by naked Elle McPherson

18:45 Shit, shower, shave

19:00 Watch news - Brad Pitt assassinated; marajuana and porn legalized

19:30 Dinner - Lobster appetisers, Dom Perignon, big juicy fillet steak followed by Ice cream served on a pair of tits

21:00 Napoleon Brandy and Cohuna cigar in front of wall size TV as you watch Match of the Day

21:30 Sex with three women [all with lesbian tendencies]

23:00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and cleansing ale

23:30 Night cap blow job

23:45 In bed alone

23:50 A 12 second fart which changes notes 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room




Now for something completely different.


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BY TOM PEYER