knawmean

The longer I go on, the less I want to. The more friends I make, the more alone I feel. The better I do in school, the more I feel like it's all for nothing. The more people compliment me, the more I'm reminded of the flaws they're not mentioning. I have moments when I don't think about it, but those moments require extreme concentration on something else. I have ADD.

I feel my soul colapsing, soon to be dead. The hairline fracture that bitch caused in my heart has turn into a fissure. Partially because the other one took a pick axe to it, but it's mostly because... I can't find anyone else. But why?

Could be that there's just something so wrong with me emotionally that I won't take the initiative. Maybe it's the fundamental flaws in my DNA that make me unattractive to women. Maybe the Universe, God, the giant space goat or whatever has it in for me because of something I did when I was twelve. Whatever it is, I feel alone and that it won't ever change.

I'm going to die alone. That scares me more than anything in the world; partly because it could be tonight but mostly because it will probably be fifty years from now.. I have a lot to give, and nobody wants it.