kittiesuicide

After all I have been through so far in my life I never thought things could get any worse. It's only been tonight that I have realised how aweful some things people have done to me (if that makes sense).
My mind is all blurry and I dont know how to express what Im feeling exactly. Just feeling pain I guess.
Its also really hard to explain what I mean without saying what has happened to me but all I'll say is that it is absolutely traumatising what has happened and Im going back to the police to re-make a statement.
I always thought this person did something to me for three years when in reality it was alot longer. It's like I've completely blocked out my childhood for me to try to cope. It isnt just me tho, my mother has done that til tonight when things just started to hit her as they're wrong!! All my life Ive blamed her for his wrongdoing and not protecting me.
I just thought things couldn't get any worse but they definately have. Maybe I should write lyrics instead of wanting to punch walls.
I really don't know what to do with myself anymore.