So basically, I'm an asshole. Or better yet, I'm being a dick so I've been told. I don't have this coping well thing down yet. I get a birth shitty news and BAM! Crazy bitch.

I guess I'm just trying to give people the opportunity to "walk away". There's someone I look forward to talking to everyday. I don't have the balls or willpower to
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So I'm sure some of you are confused with certain things I say. Hopefully this clears some of it up ;)

I'm going to be putting a stop to my blogs about my journey for time being. It has come to my attention that basically "nobody gives a shit". If you'd like updated or just wanna chat, inbox me! I always reply and I'll happily enlighten you!!!!

Love you all!

Currently getting chemo as I type, yay for wifi!

Xoxoxo!

In bed sick on this Sunday night sucks balls.

Someone send me some funnies to cheer me up :)

Tomorrow is Round 2!

I know I'm a broken record but seriously...... You guys rock! @elkcrazy32, I owe you my life. You help me when I'm down, and you help me keep my head high. I'll cherish our friendship til the day I die! @ameline, you're
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So, last night was probably the first time in weeks that I got to hang out with people. A group. We went bowling. It was sooooo great to get out, have fun and laugh again. Everything was forgotten. I may have overdone it though. I played 2 rounds, and by the last frame I was spent. I definately overdone it, but I couldn't show it....
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To say that SG has change my life, is an understatement. I've never been "accepted" as I am here. I've always been the oddball in every situation. Still am. But here it's accepted, ten fold.

For some people I've never physically met, as lame as it is, I consider you some of my closest friends. You've seen me in my skivvies for Christs sake!!!!! One...
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So, this week has been a huge eye opener for me.

I love you all. For the concerns, the love, the well wishes.

I had my first round of chemoradiotherapy. Say that 10 times fast.

On a suckage scale of 1-10(10 being a lot), it was a 28!!!!

I've never been this sick before. :( it's been brutal. I didn't think I could look anymore...
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The title is fitting. Was told I wouldn't need chemo. Apparently that's not the case. Starting Cisplatin (chemo) tomorrow.

This whole ordeal has been not quite a blur, but a meh! Until tomorrow.

To say I'm scared, is a motherfucking understatement.

I mentioned to a friend something about throwing up and losing my hair, in the same sentence, & how in scared for that.

His...
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So, this is a recap of my crazy, depressing, happy, exhausting, & relaxing week!

First of all, I started back at the gym. Against doctors orders of course, but I wasn't (still ain't) happy in my own skin. It seems to be paying off. I know it's only been a couple weeks, but I'm just overall more confident.

My radiation is taking a toll on...
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Today for a change I'm only focusing on the positive!!!!!!

We had snowwwww! Pretty overnight snow!!!!! At 6am, it was soooo calm and pretty in my driveway.

Although against doctors orders, I went back to the gym. I was wonderful. Burned 450 cal, give or take and managed to avoid most of the "grunters"! On the slow and steady track of musclin' up and losin'
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