Does anybody else feel like this year has been just flying by? I'm starting to be under the assumption that time isn't measured, it's felt.
Anyways! Doing one of my random drive-bys to clue everyone in on life. This year has been exceptionally difficult, not many of you know but I'm inflicted with a number of medical issues that greatly and severely affect life. Sometimes as much as I'd love to come on here and talk to you guys, my fingers won't even bend some days to strike the keys. This blog is a little less about tips and tricks and more of a desperate plea for yours. @rambo @missy
Currently my greatest hurdle is due to my skeletal being. We all know and love my big boobies but those in addition to my health issues is causing great difficulty. I have had bulging and herniated discs for as long as I can remember, it's always been a chronic painful problem... it's now affected to spine to the point I can no longer stand or sit for more than a few minutes before I'm in extreme pain. As I've gotten older, it's been a test of my pride to accept the things my body SHOULDN'T be doing, even if I think I can push myself to do things.
I promise, disabled at 25 was NOT the plan; I'll take my little cane but actually being considered handicapped.... I wasn't ready.
And here's the thing... they don't tell you about the part that's not the physical pain. The part where your entire world crumbles around you. The part where everything that you knew was your reality, changes.
Having Lupus, I'm used to needing to give my body breaks. I could accept sitting down for a little while. But coming to a complete halt.... I just can't accept that yet.
But I know I have to. I can't keep getting jobs and quitting because I actually CAN'T perform the job functions. Or if I can perform the job functions, how long before someone at work gets sick... then I get sick... then I get hospitalized...
Just venting, today is a better day but because it is, I need to figure out how to manage my new realities...
If anyone on have an autoimmune disease.. or a disability, or anything that you feel like has completely changed your life, please comment on this blog. One of the things I have always loved about SG is our ability to be such strong women while also being allowed to be human within the site. I guess in a way that's part of what makes us so much more beautiful, is knowing that such beauty can remain despite whatever adversity it's facing. Stay well, Rise well, Be well.
-Siren
