killary

I realized lately that I am OCD about my hands being dirty. I gotta wash my hands if I think they're sweaty, sticky, etc. After I smoke a cigarette I hate that my right hand stinks like cigarettes. After I eat pizza (because I pick that shit apart) I hate having grease or sauce under my nails. MUST. CLEAN. HANDS.

In a situation where people normally shake hands, I offer 'pounds' instead. The tops of your fingers/knuckles are the least likely to have germies on them, thereby making contact with my hand is the least dirty way. Sure, if it's for a job interview or something, I'll shake a hand. Otherwise, fuck naw! I don't know where you been and what you been doin' with your hands! Don't touch my shit!



This slight phobia-esque hang up may also be why I don't like hugging.

Don't get all body-on-body with me. Your aura is touching mine! EEEWWWW!



A select few family/friends know that I am not all huggy-huggy and go out of their way to trap me in a bear hug for laughs. They don't know that deep down I am really thinking, "Yeah, laugh now you mother fucker.. but if you don't let me go in 5 seconds I am going RAMBO on your shit.." or they might not force hugs on me.

I like how black guys do the half hug thing. But they grasp hands to do it. I can't catch a break



(In case it's not apparent I am not really a touchy-feely person. I am only touchy-feely when I want to get laid. So I see no other reason to put my arm around you if it's not gonna lead to boom-boom.)