How does one stich ones self to ones self

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So I'm trying to figure out how to self stich my thumb on my dominant hand but I don't trust my non dominant hand enough to actually go for it. Damn it left hand, you've been in the game for 33 years but you still write like a kindergartener on a sugar high. How can I be sure you won't sew my thumb to my middle finger again. Annnnd never mind... I had to much thumb anyway.

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