okay so i had my interview at hot topic... i hope i get the job extra cash and something to keep my mind off this shit i am going through would be great... i had to take a whole 4 and 1/2 days off work this past week and i am gonna be hurting for money... see i have been working my job since the end of jan and since they don't count holiday vacations and weekends my 90 day probation period isn't even up yet... therefore i can't get sick days yet... it really sucks that as i was going through all this shit the one thing i stressed the most about was how i am going to pay rent this coming month... oh well i always figure something out... okay so that promotion at my current job i have been waiting to get for months now is finally mine... in a couple weeks i will be making 3.5 more dollars an hors but working full time the whole summer... for a little bit this summer i will be getting double paychecks because since jan they have been prorating my pay for summer paychecks... but since i didn't work the whole year i can't get paid the whole summer... but when those double checks are coming in i am going to be oh so happy i may even be able to catch up on all the bills i am soooo far behind on... i hate having to pick which bills are the most important to pay... so micah and i cancelled our cable package and i can't watch queer as folk, the sopranos, six feet under, or any other hbo and showtime series i love... that sucks but i still have tlc and discovery i can still watch my design and garage shows i really have no life someone come rescue me from my boring life... i have so many things i want to do but money is usually required and i have none of that to spend... i need to buy my own frisbee golf disc so i can go out when cliff isn't in town... that's what i am going to do with my first double paycheck it is decided... i am still waiting on the call back from the charter school i had the mini interview with... they said about 2 weeks or so... that is so nerve racking... ihave to go back to the doctor next wednesday to get my blood checked to see if the test is still coming back positive... i have to do that once a week until it is negative again... i really hope this whole ordeal is over soon... i just want to get back to a normal life and try to pull myself back together and i am having a hard time doing that when i know that i have to worry about infection and positive results meaning there is something wrong... i just want to find a good therapist and pull myself together again... i know it will take time but healing mentally will be so much easier when i am physically healed... it will be less to worry about you know... did everyone see nicolelee's new bling bling set... how exciting i know how much she wanted that set to go up... make sure to go comment on how beautiful she looks... love you all and kisses to you...
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...gods it makes me want to cry...