http://www.ohio.edu/outlook/08-09/October/99.cfm
Today, Lianne's (or Elsie's) mom called me. I was not expecting it, but I was very glad that she contacted me. We talked about Lianne and her passing and what a blessing Lianne was to the world. I am going to give her some prints from our photo shoot in September. I am so honored to be able to do this. Lianne's mom told me that even though I didn't get to know Lianne as much as I would've liked, and even though we were only friends for a short time before Lianne died, I was a gift to her and her life. I thought it was the most powerful thing I've ever been told. Her mom is so incredibly strong. Talking to her changed my day, my week, my horribly dreary month... hell, my entire experience as a college student. It is not every day that you feel so privileged and so incredibly grateful to have touched another soul like that.
When I think about this... it is still difficult to register. And on top of everything else that has disoriented and pained me this quarter... some times, the world feels like such a sad place, and I end up feeling so small. Even with group therapy and good music and open conversation and a loving support system, it is so easy to feel alone when I'm hurting.
Last night I listened to Rufus Wainwright's version of "Across the Universe" before going to bed. This is probably one of the most compelling songs, at least it has always been to me. I just laid in the dark and sobbed. I felt like I couldn't breathe, like my body just couldn't handle everything I was feeling... for all of the struggle that exists in all of the beauty. It sounds cheesy and maybe a little "out there," but even with all of the pain in the world, life is so overwhelmingly beautiful. I cannot help but think of the closing scenes to American Beauty.
Earlier this quarter my kitty Sebastian suddenly passed away. My mom called me to tell me minutes after it happened. Our family loved Sabbie for eight long years, and he was definitely a strong presence in the family... he commanded any room he entered... the thought of him not being there when I go home for the holidays... and to think that a year ago, I lost Viola and Molly at the beginning of October. It seems like so much. I feel so melancholic for all of the displaced remnants of my childhood. The loss of my pets and my childhood home coupled with the fact that my sister is now attending grad school in California and I, myself, am nearing the end of my term as an undergrad... growing up isn't so gradual. One day you wake up, and it's as though you've lost all those familiar comforts. All at once. The people and places that constitute your reality are in constant flux, and though loss is inevitable, it doesn't make it any easier.
I'd also like to take a minute to acknowledge the passing of Dan's beloved pet, Maurice. She died the same day that Viola and Molly died last year. I feel like Maurice was also my pet in many ways, as I helped care for her for a long time, even when she didn't officially belong to Dan yet. She stayed at my house on several occasions, and I'll never forget the time she broke free from her exercise ball and simply disappeared. I was so frantically upset and worried that something terrible happened to her. Then my dad wandered down in the basement and, lo and behold, Maurice. Silly little thing. I still have no idea how she got down there.
---
I realize that I haven't blogged in some time... well, not at any length, anyway. School is school. Work is work. Life is life. I could just leave it at that, but I will humor you (and me) with an elaboration.
My fashion photography class is going well, and I am actually learning so much. My portfolio class forces effort out of me, but necessary effort. It is sort of self-paced in that everything I do for the class is on my own time and dollar. I ordered my portfolio... my actual, tangible portfolio. It is red and plastic-y and shiny. It was $100. I also re-designed and perfected my resume. I bought my domain name and am halfway done creating my web site. Business cards are in production. I really need to make new prints but other than that... bada bing! Internship city. Business law is dreadful and I am not doing as well as I would like, but at least I have Drew's companionship in the class to get me through it. For my sociology minor, I am taking an environmental sociology class which is heaps of work but very rewarding. I have fallen behind the coursework for this class, but at least I have a solid A, and at least I am engaged with the material. Overall, this is definitely the most difficult quarter I've had in college thus far.
My apartment is lovely. Spacious and new and stylish. I am happy here, but I am living elsewhere for next year. Last week I signed the lease for my "new" home. I will be living with my friend Emily and Carrie in Emily's current house, which is charming and, above all, huge. Also, we will have a kitty friend named Cali (Emily's cat who also currently lives with her). I am looking forward to having an animal to love in Athens.
I work in the office for the School of Visual Communication here at OU. Basically I answer the phone, make copies, and chit chat with various members of the faculty. Since my major is housed in the School of Visual Communication, I see a lot of familiar faces. It's nice. It's easy. It isn't a huge time commitment. I have no complaints.
I have so many photos to share, but I am far too lazy to sort through them, copying and pasting URLs and all that jazz. So, go here: FLICKRRIFFIC. The first 3 pages are mostly all new photos. I will keep you posted when ericamckeehen.com goes live officially.
Be well. Love one another. And God bless.
Today, Lianne's (or Elsie's) mom called me. I was not expecting it, but I was very glad that she contacted me. We talked about Lianne and her passing and what a blessing Lianne was to the world. I am going to give her some prints from our photo shoot in September. I am so honored to be able to do this. Lianne's mom told me that even though I didn't get to know Lianne as much as I would've liked, and even though we were only friends for a short time before Lianne died, I was a gift to her and her life. I thought it was the most powerful thing I've ever been told. Her mom is so incredibly strong. Talking to her changed my day, my week, my horribly dreary month... hell, my entire experience as a college student. It is not every day that you feel so privileged and so incredibly grateful to have touched another soul like that.
When I think about this... it is still difficult to register. And on top of everything else that has disoriented and pained me this quarter... some times, the world feels like such a sad place, and I end up feeling so small. Even with group therapy and good music and open conversation and a loving support system, it is so easy to feel alone when I'm hurting.
Last night I listened to Rufus Wainwright's version of "Across the Universe" before going to bed. This is probably one of the most compelling songs, at least it has always been to me. I just laid in the dark and sobbed. I felt like I couldn't breathe, like my body just couldn't handle everything I was feeling... for all of the struggle that exists in all of the beauty. It sounds cheesy and maybe a little "out there," but even with all of the pain in the world, life is so overwhelmingly beautiful. I cannot help but think of the closing scenes to American Beauty.
Earlier this quarter my kitty Sebastian suddenly passed away. My mom called me to tell me minutes after it happened. Our family loved Sabbie for eight long years, and he was definitely a strong presence in the family... he commanded any room he entered... the thought of him not being there when I go home for the holidays... and to think that a year ago, I lost Viola and Molly at the beginning of October. It seems like so much. I feel so melancholic for all of the displaced remnants of my childhood. The loss of my pets and my childhood home coupled with the fact that my sister is now attending grad school in California and I, myself, am nearing the end of my term as an undergrad... growing up isn't so gradual. One day you wake up, and it's as though you've lost all those familiar comforts. All at once. The people and places that constitute your reality are in constant flux, and though loss is inevitable, it doesn't make it any easier.
I'd also like to take a minute to acknowledge the passing of Dan's beloved pet, Maurice. She died the same day that Viola and Molly died last year. I feel like Maurice was also my pet in many ways, as I helped care for her for a long time, even when she didn't officially belong to Dan yet. She stayed at my house on several occasions, and I'll never forget the time she broke free from her exercise ball and simply disappeared. I was so frantically upset and worried that something terrible happened to her. Then my dad wandered down in the basement and, lo and behold, Maurice. Silly little thing. I still have no idea how she got down there.
---
I realize that I haven't blogged in some time... well, not at any length, anyway. School is school. Work is work. Life is life. I could just leave it at that, but I will humor you (and me) with an elaboration.
My fashion photography class is going well, and I am actually learning so much. My portfolio class forces effort out of me, but necessary effort. It is sort of self-paced in that everything I do for the class is on my own time and dollar. I ordered my portfolio... my actual, tangible portfolio. It is red and plastic-y and shiny. It was $100. I also re-designed and perfected my resume. I bought my domain name and am halfway done creating my web site. Business cards are in production. I really need to make new prints but other than that... bada bing! Internship city. Business law is dreadful and I am not doing as well as I would like, but at least I have Drew's companionship in the class to get me through it. For my sociology minor, I am taking an environmental sociology class which is heaps of work but very rewarding. I have fallen behind the coursework for this class, but at least I have a solid A, and at least I am engaged with the material. Overall, this is definitely the most difficult quarter I've had in college thus far.
My apartment is lovely. Spacious and new and stylish. I am happy here, but I am living elsewhere for next year. Last week I signed the lease for my "new" home. I will be living with my friend Emily and Carrie in Emily's current house, which is charming and, above all, huge. Also, we will have a kitty friend named Cali (Emily's cat who also currently lives with her). I am looking forward to having an animal to love in Athens.
I work in the office for the School of Visual Communication here at OU. Basically I answer the phone, make copies, and chit chat with various members of the faculty. Since my major is housed in the School of Visual Communication, I see a lot of familiar faces. It's nice. It's easy. It isn't a huge time commitment. I have no complaints.
I have so many photos to share, but I am far too lazy to sort through them, copying and pasting URLs and all that jazz. So, go here: FLICKRRIFFIC. The first 3 pages are mostly all new photos. I will keep you posted when ericamckeehen.com goes live officially.
Be well. Love one another. And God bless.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
It's not so much that people know I'm a fan of the site that's the issue since I really don't care about my classmates knowing that. Just the fact that people are judging me from it without at least taking a few seconds to wither go on the site or go into wikipedia and look it up. Bah. Though I'm probably better off without those kinds of people in my life.
Though the whole thing has me wondering what will I end up doing should something like that happen again later in life - I really don't want SG mixing with my professional life. It's something that I will have to wait and see what happens.
Good luck with the internship, and erm, the election!
btw, your Flickr pictures are awesome great colours, and contrasts in all the portraits - I only ever seem to take landscapes, and people in any of mine, more than often look like they have stepped into the photo like a deer in the headlights.